10.23.2005

world series

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In honor of the world series that's going on right now, I thought I'd post a baseball-ish type picture. Granted, this is no proclamation of love for either of the world series teams (or a team that either my brother or I really like for that matter), but I found it while rummaging though some old pictures, and thought it would be fitting.

Go Brewers... I mean, go Astros... I mean, shoot, they lost to the Sox the other night... Go... Um...

Oh, nevermind... I don't care.

10.22.2005

mos

Tonight, I met another music junkie. A whoo hoo. I actually got together with a friend of mine that I haven't spent time with in a really long time. She and I were friends in high school, and then we went to college together for a year and a half. She got married back in 2002, and we pretty much haven't seen in other in the past two years. But we reconnected last weekend, and decided to hang out tonight. She and I had a great time together, reminiscing about old times. I met her dog Doodle, her cat Vinny, and her turtle Dick Tracy. We talked about all sort of stuff regarding our lives, what shows we are addicted to, and she even showed me this weird video game she's addicted to. I think it's called Katamari? Anybody out there heard of it? Anyway, we were having fun getting caught up, and then her husband came home. The topic of music came up... Oh man. So great. So fun to find someone else with somewhat similar interest, but different enough to give me some good suggestion I may have never found. One of the bands he suggested, I'm totally diggin'. Mates of State. I think Troy Hatfield mentioned them on his blog a while back, but I never took the time to check them out. You guys, they're awesome. It's a husband and wife duo, and it's just keyboards/organ with drums. Sounds weird, but it's actually very, very cool. Very unique sounds, but they have some killer harmonies, and just a really good blend of sound. Definitely pleasing to the ear. So if you get a chance - check them out. Mates of State. They rock.

10.20.2005

DDR

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About a year ago, I was helping out with the junior high and high school ministry at my church. There is a little thing called Dance Dance Revolution that worked magic with them. Something about a dance-off just resonated so deeply with them that they found themselves playing it all the time, every week, without fail (well, at least the juniors highers).

I was walking to my car the other night. It was parked in the Union Lot at school, which is a covered parking structure. As I entered the floor where my car was parked, I could hear music blaring from someone’s car. As I got closer, I was able to see that it wasn’t just someone listening to tunes, but rather, a dance lesson of sorts. This guy and girl were attempting to teach two other people how to dance. It was great. I was highly entertained.

So many songs prompt you to dance… As I sit here and think about it, a whole slew of songs came to mind. “Move Your Feet” by Junior Senior, “Untitled” by Modest Mouse where they tell you to “Dance, D-D-Dance, Dance and go crazy!” “Rock Your Body” by Justin Timberlake, and the “shameful indulgence” I just can’t seem to get enough of lately, “Dance Dance” by Fall Out Boy.

There are shows on TV – “So You Think You Can Dance,” “Dance With The Stars,” not to mention all of the music reality shows (such as Making the Band and American Idol) that require large amounts of dancing. For years, people have mimicked one of history’s greatest dance icons, Michael Jackson. High schools have dances, there are business establishments dedicated to being a house for dancing, and you can’t tell me that if you hear a good beat, your body isn’t in SOME way responding to it – whether it be breaking out your Napoleon Dynamite moves, or simply tapping your foot.

Movement, to some extent, is inevitable when it comes to music. I once had a friend, in sincerest honesty, look at me dumbfounded, unable to understand my statement: “I don’t like to dance.” He obviously loves to dance, and was completely baffled that someone would actually say they didn’t. I’ll say it. Typically, I don’t like to dance. It is awkward. Makes me uncomfortable. And I just don’t find it fun. Maybe that’s because I’m a bad dancer. Maybe it’s because I grew up thinking it was “bad”. I don’t know… All I know is, I don’t dance.

However, that doesn’t mean that I don’t like dance. I’m absolutely fascinated with it. I love to watch all sorts of dance… I remember torturing myself through the horrible movie “U Got Served” just so I could watch the amazing dancing. There’s something so cool about the way people can move their bodies to a specific rhythm and make it look artistic and beautiful.

Dancing… What a crazy, but artistic notion. Ballet. Tap. Hip-Hop. Interpretive. African. Modern. Polka. Jig. Square. And even video-game-induced. So cool.

10.18.2005

you're it - no tag backs

Ok, so I got tagged... Again. So this time I claim, NO TAG BACKS. hahaha

My friend Emily got tagged and didn't know who else to tag, so she changed the rules up a bit. Here are her new rules:

This time, list 5 places you'd like to spend your weekend. For extra fun, add what you would do if you could be there (or, who you'd bring along).

1.) LA - I'd go to a restaurant called Tagine & spend hours upon end sitting on the shoreline

2.) Chi-town - visiting some of my favorite peeps down there

3.) Boston - to see all the places I missed the first time I went

4.) NYC - never been there, always wanted to go. I'd definitely hit up the Conan O'Brien show

5.) Seattle - another place I've never been, and always wanted to visit.

I'd love to put somewhere far away on there, but well, if it's only for the weekend, I'd spend a good chunk of it flying if I went overseas. If I could travel anywhere though it'd be between England, New Zealand, and somewhere in Africa.

Alright, in keeping with the game, I guess I'm supposed to tag new people. Therefore, I tag - with the new "where'd you like to go for the weekend" rules:

K.Finn
Kaydo
Sunny
Chris H.
Parke

joy, part one

This post was inspired by an idea that both just.in and k.finn expressed on their blogs a while back. They went through a list of their top 100 joys in life, and I thought it was such a great idea as it allowed readers of their blogs to see a little bit of who they are. And not only that, it was just a cool way to give a little shout out to the creator of those “joys”.

So I would like to join in on the fun of the “joy list”. Here are my first 50. They are not in any order of importance. More like, the order they came to my head.

1.) Thunderstorms
2.) Late night drives with the windows down and the tunes cranked
3.) Watching a kid eat an ice cream cone
4.) Understanding God through creation
5.) The leaves changing colors during fall
6.) When a kid doesn’t know the words to a song, and makes them up
7.) When an adult doesn’t know the words, and makes them up
8.) Starburst jellybeans
9.) Coloring
10.) Apple picking
11.) Watching a dad play with his children
12.) Seeing my parents being loving towards each other
13.) Seeing my bro & sis-in-law being loving towards each other
14.) A good music conversation
15.) Late-night talks about “Lost”
16.) Rhyming conversations with people (“Rapping,” if you will)
17.) Playing in the rain
18.) People watching
19.) Hanging out with high school & junior high kids
20.) Pojo’s fashion sense
21.) Looking through people’s family photos
22.) Christmas time, and all that comes with it!
23.) Large bodies of water – ocean, lake, river, bay, etc.
24.) Sunsets (um, I don’t see too many sunrises)
25.) Road trips
26.) Laughing and crying simultaneously
27.) Seeing Scripture in a COMPLETELY new light
28.) A letter from a distant friend
29.) Girl talk
30.) Blue Moon ice cream
31.) Unexpected free time
32.) Daisies
33.) Walking barefoot through sand
34.) Playing the piano
35.) Listening to someone else play the piano
36.) Watching someone open a gift
37.) “This is how we met” stories
38.) Seeing a friend be able to master something
39.) “Getting lost” out in nature
40.) Catching fireflies
41.) Band jams
42.) Mix tapes (though now, I suppose "playlists")
43.) Having quality “coffee talks” with friends and family
44.) Reading a good, challenging book
45.) Calvin & Hobbes
46.) Drinking cocoa or cider after playing in the snow
47.) When a good friend asks “How are you?” and means it
48.) Randomness
49.) A little kid learning to read and reading out loud
50.) Hugs

Ok… stay tuned for Joy Part 2 to come sometime in the near future.
There’s plenty more to add…

10.17.2005

tagged

I got tagged... Mr. Drew Brown tagged me. So what does that mean? Check out the rules...

THE RULES: List five songs that you are currently loving. It doesn't matter what genre they are from, whether they have words, or even if they're any good, but they must be songs you're really enjoying right now. Post these instructions, the artists, and the songs in your blog. Then tag five other friends to see what they're listening to.

Here are my songs:

Stealing Kisses - by Lori McKenna
Saeglópur - by Sigur Ros
All These Things That I've Done - by The Killers
Around the Clock - by The Rocket Summer
Merchants of Soul - by Spoon

Ok... Those have been the "most frequently played" for me lately.

Now, for the people I'm going to tag...
I choose:

Vicky Brown
Dave Sandell
Meghan Forness
Justin Wise
Brandon Brown

10.15.2005

elizabethtown

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Do you ever have those moments in life, where you look at something, and say, “That! That right there… That is what makes life great”?

That was the feeling I left with tonight. Cameron Crowe has a way of creating these moments. Moments you want to be a part of. Moments we’ve experienced. Moments that hit us each in different ways. Maybe Cameron Crowe movies don’t do that for you, but they do for me.

And Elizabethtown is no exception. Can I tell you how much I loved this movie? I loved it for so many reasons. I wish I could write about it more in depth, but I know there are a few of you out there who are super excited to see it, so I don’t want to ruin the experience for you. But I loved this movie.

However, the feelings I left with were both good and bad. Like I said at the beginning of the post, it makes me say, “That! That is what makes life great.” And while true, I think that the mix of feelings is because there were elements of it that I could recognize in my own life, and elements that I saw were not a part of my life. But I wanted them…

I am anxious for more people to go see this movie. Especially music lovers. If you’re a music lover, you’ll DEFINITELY appreciate this movie… Cameron Crowe always does such a beautiful job with the music. So great.

But for now, I’ll leave you with this last image… It was one of my favorites from the poster, along with the picture of Orlando holding an urn and an American flag. But for some reason, I absolutely loved this picture… Maybe it’s because I’ve seemed to have a bit of a one-track mind lately…

P.S. - Cameron Crowe is my music-loving hero!
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10.13.2005

new to the library

Well friends, as was decided a while ago, I’m keeping a music integration within my blog. Music is such a huge part of my life, so it’d feel kind of weird to leave it out of the normal mix of things. Maybe if it gets really bad, and I find that it’s ALL I can talk about, then I’ll start a separate music blog. But for now, the music stays here. So, rest assured Dave, you only have to check ONE blog, so that you won’t “get confused”.

Well, here's what's new to the music library:

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Augustana – All The Stars and Boulevards
I purchased this album a few weeks ago. I had downloaded their song “Stars and Boulevards” a while back when iTunes was offering it as their free song of the week. I really liked the song, and decided to sample the rest of their stuff. I fell in love with the song “Boston”. I am a sucker for piano, and that song hit me just right. The rest of the album is pretty good… It’s not what I would consider to be musical genius, but it’s definitely a “feel good” listen.

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David Crowder Band– A Collision
This is my most recent acquistion. I’m still not sure I’ve digested it fully. The one thing I absolutely love about The David Crowder Band – their blend of musical sounds, and their ability to lead their listeners to the foot of the throne. Their ability to lead worship is astounding. However, at times, the lyrics are a bit strange – childlike, if you will. For instance, there is one song where he sings “Forever, and ever, and ever, and ever, and ever, and ever…” and keeps going on for quite some time. The song is a good, head bopping song – definitely gets the energy going. But at times, makes me feel like a high school student back in youth group. This album has sound bite interludes with things like whistling, speeches and phone conversations which makes the album seem uninterrupted, and the album works very much like a story. It has a great continuity throughout the album, beginning and ending with “the lark” (you’ll know what I’m talking about if you listen to it). Overall, I rather enjoy this album – but I’m still in the process of letting it settle.

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Matisyahu – Live at Stubb’s
I have yet to pick up this album, but I’ve downloaded a couple songs from iTunes, and I’m pretty stoked about it. For those of you who are unfamiliar with Matisyahu, he’s a “Hassidic Reggae Superstar”, according to his website. Basically, it’s this reggae meets rap type music… and he’s Jewish, so it is definitely injected with that vibe. If you’re a fan of reggae, or even just interested in some really well done, artistic music, check him out. And for any of you who live in the Chi-town area, he’s playing at the Metro next month. Stellar.

Ok, that’s all for now… More music musings to come in the near future. Maybe I’ll post a new playlist (and no, Chris, it probably won’t include Alice).

Rock on my friends.

10.12.2005

disguise

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(Photo taken by Jeffrey Worthen.)

I laughed when I saw this picture – and I laughed hard. Not entirely sure why – just tickled my funny bone, I guess. Another reason why I laughed was because I just purchased this jar-like thing from Pier One that’s in the shape of a head. Basically, it’s this clear, glass jarhead. When asked why I purchased it, I tell people, “It was simply too weird and too cool to pass up.” So, when I saw this picture, it made me laugh because it made me think of my jarhead.

As funny as this picture is, as always, it got me thinking… Seems as though a lot of visuals get me thinking. A sunset. The ocean. Watching a little kid attempt to eat an ice cream cone. Seeing a tear fall down someone’s cheek. Why not add an oddly disguised mannequin head to the list?

I love this disguise though… the crazy shaggy hair, the fake mustache, the skullcap (can I tell you how much I love skullcaps, by the way?). It’s such a ridiculous disguise, isn’t it? I mean, if you saw someone walking down the street wearing such items, you might think, “Do they really think their disguise is working?” If anything, you might think the opposite – how maybe it draws attention, instead of diverting it. Sometimes I wonder how often we do that – how often I do that. How often do I wear the “I’ve got everything together” disguise, when it’s so utterly obvious that I don’t have it together? How often do I mask my struggling spiritual welfare with Sunday morning pew attire and a smile on my face? How many times do I think I’m camouflaged, when really, everyone around me can see through the gaudy façade? How many times do I leave the house looking like this mannequin head?

These questions lead me to two different rabbit trails about this whole idea of wearing a mask. First, the idea of being an image bearer… I was thinking about this concept – that I am Christ’s image bearer. SCARY! I’ll be perfectly honest; the thought of being Christ to someone else is a tad daunting to me. I like being one of his sheep… but being a representative of my shepherd, that’s a different story. Maybe that’s one of the reasons I sport the disguising digs. I’m afraid of what I may or may not represent.

But the thing that stuck with me the most is just how much my not-so-master of disguise plan interferes with community. Granted, bearing my soul to the world isn’t the ideal option either. But I often wonder what our mannequin head-like behavior does to authentic, transparent community? What happens if we don’t allow ourselves to be known by our brothers and sisters? What might we be missing out on? How is community hindered if we all come together wearing some form of disguise? What if we left our wig, fake mustache, and skullcap on the mantle, adorning the mannequin where it belongs? What would happen if we let go?

These are all questions I have been mulling over lately. I haven’t arrived at any answers. To be honest, the thought of this sort of community is both exhilarating and extremely frightening all at the same time. I mean, the thought of being able to openly and honestly “bear one another’s burdens”, and grow together as a community is such a freeing thought, but the thought of having to let my guard down, to get let go of the security found in the wig, mustache & cap? Not altogether settling. I’m not sure what to do with all these questions…

All I know, the disguise isn’t working anymore…

10.11.2005

school daze

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In an avoidance of my homework, I decided to color this Garfield picture. My mom read my blog a while ago where I wrote about coloring and how much of a release it is. The next day, I got home, and hanging on my door in a plastic Walgreen’s bag were two coloring books and a brand new box of crayons! I have a million crayons, but this was a brand new box. SCORE! Well, I decided to take advantage of this new acquisition. Due to no cable/internet at our house for the time being, I decided that coloring would be a good distraction from my homework. But I also decided that I would color something to express how I felt – and this was the picture I chose. School Daze. It not only reminded me of how I feel while sitting through all of my classes (this semester is a tough one to bear) but this picture also reminded me of one of my earliest video ventures. Granted, I have mentioned before my attempt, along with my creative sidekick Leah, to create a television station. (If you don’t know the story, ask me about it sometime… It’s kind of amusing.) However, this picture reminded me of my first real video – that would be shown to an actual audience, and that was supposed to serve an actual purpose.

When I was a senior, I was on The Student Body Council – referred to as ASB (All Student Body). I was a facilitator – basically, the doer of grunt work. My friend and I were given a project – to video tape all the events and craziness that ensue during the week of homecoming, and put a compilation video together. At the end of the week, it would be shown at the Homecoming banquet (hey, I went to a private school – we didn’t have dances!)

So my friend and I set out to tape everything we could. However, a few problems existed.
A.) Neither she nor I had ever made a compilation tape before.
B.) We found that people (especially girls) hated to be video taped.
C.) No one would humor us, and do fun things for the camera… completely stoic.

We ended up with barely any entertaining footage… Therefore, we decided to try to compensate when it came to editing. We started out the video with footage we shot at my house. We taped up a sign on the wall that said “School Daze” written all crazy-like. While that was on the screen, we edited in an audio clip from Space Ghost that we thought was hilarious. If you’ve ever listened to Space Ghost, it was a Brak sketch where he talks about hiring a monkey to take notes for him in class. We thought the clip was suiting, and thought ourselves geniuses to put this clip at the beginning of our video. Little did we know that no one else in our high school was even aware of what Space Ghost was, nor did they catch the jokes in the sketch. We then proceeded to show clips from the week, set to the song “Crazy Times” by Jars of Clay, and this song by Plumb (the name as escaped me, sorry). I remember at the time thinking how cool our video turned out. Now, I cringe to think about the fact that I was that impressed with my lack of ability.

It’s so funny that as we age, we look back on the things we did in our younger years and laugh. My journals from high school are a riot, and yet really immensely embarrassing. As I write this, I’m wondering about this blog. Will ten years from now, I look back at it and think, “What in the world was I thinking?” In ten years, will I look back and think, “Wow, what immature things to think about and write about?” Will I say to myself, “Who ever thought of the blog anyway? What a silly notion!”

10.09.2005

blogs

I wrote an article for relavantmagazine.com a while back entitled Taming The Technology Trap. While I believe the angle I presented - that technology can cause damage to human interaction, I also agree that techonology can seriously aid in human interaction. It was a tough article to write because of where I was at when I wrote it. I was struggling with how much I was sucked into all my "gadgets" and was seeing them as being destructive to human interaction. Plus, when you write those kinds of stories, being "wishy-washy" doesn't go over so well... People are going to disagree with the article no matter what, so I'd rather them disagree with an actual stance, instead of my fence riding.

But back to this idea of technology, more pointedly, blogs. I've had numerous conversations with people about the world of blogs and their functions. There have been speculations as to whether it is some sort of narcissistic act. It can be. There have been speculations that it is a sort of "public journal". It can be. There are other thoughts that it's a "foot in the door" to getting published. Could be. All of these thoughts can and may be true. But I'd like to share with you my reason for blogging, and what I absolutely love about this concept.

When I first started blogging, I had no idea why I was doing it. I knew that I was going on a road trip to California by myself, that I wanted to take my laptop with me so I could journal along the way, and that it could be a cool thing if some of my friends and family followed along with me as I traveled across the US. That was the initial start to it. Shortly after that, it became more of an online journal of sorts. I pretty much just wrote what I was thinking, and a few (we're talking like 3 or 4) of my family/friends read it. Then, after I became an intern at Relevant magazine, and a lot more people started frequenting my blog, it became an ego thing. I tried to post more important things, my writing style shifted to try to sound more professional than journalistic, I tried to become more humorous, and over all, the look and feel of my blog shifted a bit. I was also hoping that as more and more people landed on my blog, the more and more networked I would become.

That brings me to now, where I see a little bit of all of these, but there's still something more that makes doing this worthwhile. Community. Now, it's definitely a weird form of community, I'll give you that, but it's a form of community none the less. It's kind of interesting... When I talk to my friends that are here in person with me, and I'm telling them about a person I've met either via Relevant, Flickr, etc., it's weird because I'll say something like, "My Relevant friend..." or "My Flickr friend..." like somehow they haven't achieved the title of "friend" because I haven't met them live in person.

This whole blog community thing has been a strange one, but amazing. I've met people from all over, with lots of different backgrounds and interests, with different careers, different dreams and aspirations, and different lifestyles. And it rocks my socks off. I love some of the conversations I've had with people. I love asking them questions, and conversing back and forth. I love that we've been challenging each other with ideas, thoughts, and questions about God. I love the fact that I have people praying for me in different cities, states, and even countries. I love it that even though I've never met (and may never meet) some of these people, that I am able to feel comfortable having a friendship with them, and sharing our lives together.

But there's another aspect beyond meeting new people, and having new friends and that is the ability to have community with people who I already have strong relationships with, but with whom I don't share the same space anymore. I get to read about what's going on in their life, and they get to read about what's going on in mine. We can comment back and forth, challenge each other, and grow together without having to be in proximity to one another. I know that just recently, there has been a particular circle of my friends who have really gotten into visiting each others blogs... It's so awesome...

While I don't think that blogs by ANY means should replace face-to-face human interaction, I think that it's another angle of human interaction that has the potential to be huge. The impact it could have spiritually is a whole other post... But I just wanted to write a little bit about my appreciation for blogs today. For so long, I felt like such a geek for having one. Then, I felt egotistical. Now, I just feel blessed.

Thanks to all of you who come here, and allow me to be a part of your world as well.

10.07.2005

smith

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Blog community, meet Smith. Smith, meet the blog community. Smith sits on top of one of my bookshelves and looks down upon my room... So why am I writing about my sock monkey?

The reason is this. It's not really about Smith, but more about what Smith represents. I've been thinking a ton about my future. You'll have to bear with me the next few months as I question my future, and wonder what it holds. The fact that I'm graduating in May causes me to think a lot about it. And my sock monkey (among other things) has caused to me consider something - kids. Granted, I'm nowhere near having my own kids, but I've been thinking a lot more lately about how much I enjoy kids, and I enjoy their activities. My sister-in-law has been telling me this for quite some time, probably ever since I met her, that someday, I would work with children. I never bought into the idea. I think all the babysitting I did as a young teen kind of turned me off to the idea. I was a nanny for a while, but that wasn't the greatest experience either. But I keep coming back to this idea of working with children... Even in wanting to open a children's bookstore... Sure, it was initially about my love for children's literature, but the more I talk about it, the more I get excited about getting to interact with kids... Watching them learn, seeing them imagine... So great.

So Smith seems a bit of a constant reminder of this thought. I began to think about what sorts of "careers" I could pursue in working with little kids. Day care doesn't seem to interest me that much. Maybe working in ministry somewhere with kids? That seems like it'd be too many meetings, too much planning, not enough interacting.

The thought that keeps occuring to me is teaching. For a while I had thought about teaching English to high school students, and even about teaching at a collegiate level. However, the thought of teaching little kids seems kind of appealing. Like, what if I were to become an art teacher for kindergardeners? My cousin's husband does that for a living... He's so gentle and seems like he has such patience. But how fun would that be? Or what about teaching music to little kids? I remember being in like 3rd grade, and getting my first "recorder". So great - my parents were probably annoyed to death by it though...

Anyway, I know my "career interest" seems to change on a weekly basis. There's just so many things that interest me! Therefore, I'm using this as a sort of sounding board. Maybe I'll eventually land on something. But I love it when some sort of new interest is sparked - so thanks Smith. Thanks for reminding me of the funness (and yes, I've made that a word) that children can bring, and keeping an open mind to a possible future working with kids.

10.05.2005

soul junction

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soul.juntion

Check it out. It's a blogging community composed of myself, just.in, dave, j.cav, and kfinn. We're not entirely sure where it's going to go, but we thought it'd be cool to go together. so take a spin.

"I've got soul, but I'm not a soldier." - the Killers

lost

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Ok, so I was waiting for kay.do or drew.brown to post on the show "Lost" first, but, well, neither one of them are on the ball. So, I am going to stop waiting, and write about it myself.

This will just be an introductory post... I haven't really written any major spoilers, but other people might give stuff away. SO IF YOUR NAME IS DREW BROWN - IF YOU'RE READING THIS AND YOU HAVEN'T WATCHED ANY FROM SEASON TWO YET, STOP READING! AND GO WATCH THEM ON KAYDO'S TIVO! And if you're not named Drew Brown, but you haven't watched any of the 2nd season, that goes for you too.

So, if there are any of you out there who are Lost fans, and have been watching it so far, what do you think of the following?

- The theory that they are in purgatory
- Desmond's role
- Walt: real, or ghost?
- "The Others" - good or evil?
- What the "experiment" is all about?
- Will Locke's dad somehow play into it?
- AND WHAT THE HECK IS WITH JIN?

These are just a few of my ponderings... I'd love to know who out there is a fan, and theorizing with the rest of us geeks.

poll

Well, I've decided to close the poll... It's been at the same number of votes for a while now. It looks like it's a tie between those who say they don't care what I do with regards to posting about music, and those who say they like the integration. So, music will remain a good portion of my blogging experince on this here rain of wonder blog! I'm kind of glad, to be honest with you... I like having all sorts of random stuff on my blog, and taking away the music element would make it feel off balanced or something. At least, to me it would.

So for now, the music stays. No new music blog.
That having been said, coming soon: Augustana, David Crowder, and Matisyahu

10.02.2005

music blog

I was having a conversation with my brother, and I was telling him that I feel bad for the amount of blog space I use to write about music. He suggested the idea of starting a seperate music blog for people who were interested in my musical musings. So, I thought about it, and it sounded like kind of a good idea. I do however, like the fact that I write about a mixture of things on this blog, and wondered if it might be lacking a little if I take the music element out of it. Bottom line - I don't know what to do.

So, here's where you come into play. I'd like to hear your thoughts. Below is a poll... You can vote and let me know what you think about a seperate music blog. Let the voting begin...

I like hearing your thoughts...

coloring

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This post is sort of inspired by a post found on Justin's blog (see link to the right). He wrote a post about the purpose of white crayons. However, this initial conversation turned into another conversation about coloring in general. Amidst the comments was the question, "Who still colors?"

Well, I would just like to that I still have appreciation for this child-like artform. In fact, it wasn't more than 2 or 3 weeks ago, that while waiting to talk to a friend who is a barista at good old Sbux, my friend and I engaged in a coloring contest. Granted, we didn't have much to work with. The only books that were there were Barney coloring books, and we had these monsterous crayons to try to color with (it's no wonder kids can't stay in the lines - these crayons were gianormous!) Anyway, I cannot even tell you how much fun I had. Despite the fact that my friend and I were hurling insults at one another as to who's picture was better (side note: mine won), I haven't had that much fun in a long time. I have such great memories of coloring from when I was little, and it definitely has not lost it's fun as an adult. I do believe, that I shall have to make a regular occurence of coloring. It was so relaxing, and so much fun. You should try it!

But this then led me to think about other things that are child-like in nature that as an adult I still enjoy. Swings, as I have mentioned before. Night games... I know that being 25, I should probably not like running around in the dark, with dark clothes on, reaking of bug spray, hiding in trees, about to pee my pants from nervousness and excitement mixed together, and chasing after people who are trying to capture my flag, but I still have a soft spot in my heart for night games. Maybe I'm just destined to continue working with students so I get to keep playing games like Capture the Flag and Kick the Can - cause I love to play them!

Let's just say, I can't wait to have kids!

So how about you guys? Any child-like things you still engage in and find fun as an adult? Chutes-n-Ladders anyone?

9.28.2005

the bus

Anxiety and panic are nothing new to me. I get completely anxious about exams, I get really panicky when it comes to meeting new people (even though I don't usually let it get in the way of meeting new people) I get nervous about giving speeches, and there are other things I could list... But today, today I experience one of the most panicky situations I've experienced in a long time... It's going to sound kind of silly now, but at the time, it seemed oh-so-real.

I was on my way to school this afternoon. The weather was pretty crappy as it has been the past couple of days - lots of rain, lots of gray. As I got closer to Milwaukee, I reached the section of I-94 where it begins to split off into all the other major freeways, typically a high traffic area. Today my side of the freeway was pretty clear, however, the other side was totally jammed. I was right by the Marquette exit, when I looked on the other side of the freeway and saw a bus pulled over on the side of the road with cop cars behind it and along side it. Now, normally a bus on the side of the road wouldn't bother me THAT much, but today, it freaked me out! As I passed the bus, I looked at the windows, and there stood all these little kids with their hands up on the glass. They had such worried little faces, and there were so many of them! All of a sudden, 8 million thoughts ran through my head - ridiculous thoughts - what if there's a hold up on the bus? What if there's a bomb on the bus? What if something is seriously wrong and all those little kids are in danger? My heart dropped for a moment... I never felt such a surge of urgency in my life. The odd thing is, it was probably just a flat tire, or an overheated/stalled engine, or something silly. The police officers didn't seem too concerned. There wasn't anything on the radio (trust me, I checked all the traffic stations). It didn't make the news tonight.

So what actually happened with that bus? Why did I get so panicky, flipping through every station possible to see if I could find out what happened? Did I really want to know what happened? How did my anxiety go from 0-90 in like 2.2 seconds? And where was my faith that God had it under control?

For some reason, the phrase, "Just trust in God." has almost sounded cliche to me lately. How bad is that? The being in whom I entrust my entire life with, I can't even say that I do or should trust him. But for some reason, when there's a tough situation, and someone says, "Just trust in God" it just sounds like we can just sit back and not do anything. That just because God is in control, we can sit passively by until he figures it out and lets us in on the plan. I don't know that I believe this to be true. Do I believe God is in control? Yes. But do I believe in the word "just"? No. Most definitely not.

I do not by any means have this mastered... heck no. Sometimes, I find myself going in the opposite direction. I am TOO proactive, and forget about who it is that's at work (or trying to be at work) in me... Sometimes I'm too prideful/selfish/blind to see that God's like, "Oh hey, remember me? The one who can give you strength? Wisdom? Guidance?" However, this phrase "Just trust in God". I hear it so much, that often times, it makes me cringe.

Anyway, I decided when I was about 5 minutes away from the bus that there was nothing I could do. Obviously, the police had it under control. It's not like I could just pull up and say to a cop, "Hello. I'm Tory Dolan. What seems to be the problem here?" I'm sure they had it under control. And I had to just let it go, or I would continue to be anxious the rest of the day. But for whatever reason it made me start thinking of this idea of letting go vs. passivity, and passivity vs. activism. Knowing when the situation is indeed completely out of your hands that really all you can do is trust in God, or whether it's a cop out... Pushing, fighting, figuring it out is too hard, and so you therefore JUST TRUST IN GOD, instead of coming along side God and working through it with his help, you know?

Those were just a few of the thoughts that formulated after the bus experience today. It kind of started me thinking about the idea of what is within my means to act on, and when I just need to relinquish it to God... Any thoughts out there on this? I don't think it's a cut and dry issue, but I'm just curious if you guys have ever felt that struggle between the two. When am I just giving up and not putting for the effort, and when is it that God is calling me to let go? Let me know if you have any thoughts. I'd be interested in hearing them.

9.27.2005

raindance

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Raindances are often needed, and most definitely welcomed. Typically, I'd be all over a raindance - playing in the rain is one of my favorite things to do! But during the storm we had a few days ago, I decided to capture some of the joy tha comes from raindances. The above picture is a picture of the fabulous Jo giggling as the rain started to come down harder. I love it when it rains...

(p.s. - you can see the rest of my "raindance" pictures and other fun & random pictures at the link that says "my pics")

delicate mix

I realize that I tend to write about music way more than I should... But what can I say? It's a huge part of my life. I will write a non-music related post after this one, but I wanted to post my current play list, as I'm pretty excited about it. It's got a lot of mellow music, a lot of piano, and some great vocals... So here it is folks...

The Delicate Mix

Hide and Seek - Imogen Heap
Drugs or Me (new mix) - Jimmy Eat World
Never Leave Alone Your Heart - Butterfly Boucher (thanks Sarah!)
How To Save A Life - The Fray (Thanks Kyle!)
Boston - Augustana
Honestly - Cary Brothers
Casimir Pulaski Day - Sufjan Stevens
Delicate - Damien Rice
Beautiful Man - Lori McKenna (Thanks Zach!)
Silent All These Years - Tori Amos
Chances - Athlete
Face Down - Katie Todd Band
Bedshaped - Keane
I Know You Are But What Am I? - Mogwai
Saeglópur - Sigur Ros

If you haven't heard the new Jimmy Eat World EP with the "Drugs or Me" new mix on there, check it out - it's an awesome EP. Boston by Augustana is becoming one of my favorite songs, and my friend Kyle introduced me to "The Fray" which I will have to check more in depth in the near future. But for now, this is what I'm listening to... and rather enjoying it.

9.24.2005

3ps

My brother and sister-in-law were home the past couple of days. My dad had to go into the hospital and so they came home just to "check in" on things. However, the couple days they were here proved for some very interesting conversation about purgatory, personality, and passion.

Purgatory. I know, that sounds like a weird conversation topic given the fact that I'm Protestant. However, the conversation revolved the topic of the show Lost. I'm not sure how many of you watch Lost, but it is a new found favorite with the Illinois Dolans, and I'm a bit of a fan myself. I initially started watching it because of Dominic Monaghan (I know, I'm a geek - don't mock me). Initially, I was pretty turned off by the show - felt it was pretty cheesy. However, as the season went on, I slowly regained an intrigue, and started watching again. The season finale left me one frustrated girl. My brother and his wife watched the DVDs just recently, and are completely hooked. So, while they were home, we talked about the different theories that are floating about, and we landed upon the theory that the survivors on the island are actually in purgatory. We don't necessarily think this is the true theory, but we decided to discuss the possibilities of it. It lead for some VERY interesting conversation, only for us to ask "Wait, is that a part of purgatory?" quite often. I find it funny that a lot of our conversation revolved around Lost and this idea of purgatory... But we're hooked, that's for sure... Kelly even has the Lost sting (like, the sound bite thing at the beginning of the show when showing the title) on his iPod. (Don't worry Drew, I haven't crossed into "Lost is better than 24" land).

Personality. Lots of conversation about the enneagram test - a personality test to help understand what your own personality is, as well as how to interact with other personalities. Has anyone else out there taken it? My brother's friend John was the one who originally directed me towards the enneagram test in order to better figure out some relationship stuff, but now my brother and sister-in-law are quite into it, reading a lot, and trying to learn as much as possible about the interworkings of different personalities. I'm a 2, for those of you who care. If you read the description, it's pretty fitting.
I'm not going to put it all here, but one of the sites I went to where you can take a free test is www.9types.com. It's a little different than the book my sister-in-law has on it, but it's still pretty close.

Passions. My sister-in-law and I got into an interesting conversation about what the next year will hold for each of us. She's looking for a new field of work/new job, and I'm trying to figure out what I'm going to do once I graduate. I told her that I have been asked quite a bit lately "If you could do anything in the world you wanted - no limitations - what would it be?" Obviously, I really want to be a wife and mom. However, if we're talking career here, I told her (as well as all the other people who have asked me) that I would like to open a children's booksore. I told her I have NO IDEA how to go about doing that, but it incorporates SO many of my passions - kids, literature, art, etc. I have so may ideas of what it would be like, and what I would do with it - but no idea where to start. She and I had an awesome conversation about the steps necessary to get to where you want to go. Even though I have no further ideas as to how I'm going to get there, she made it sound so possible. So who knows... 5 years from now, I may be known as "Tory Dolan - Bookstore Owner", not just "Tory Dolan - Girl who blogs about how much she'd like to open a bookstore."

Anyway, those were some of my thoughts over the past couple of days. I've actually had a TON more - especially about my dad and hurricane Rita, however, they're not the most uplifting thoughts so I thought I'd spare you and write about three things that I find really interesting right now.

Sorry this isn't the most exciting or witty post... They can't all be winners though now, can they?
Rock on until later, my friends.

9.20.2005

Bob Appreciation

I was sharing stories about one of my favorite Bobs. To the friend I was sharing with, I said, “Yeah, and he’s just one of a few really great Bobs.” She was unaware of just how many amazing Bobs there are in the world. I’m thinking maybe, just maybe, you have not thought of this either. If given time, you may be able to come up with a good list. But to help you with that process, and to spur you on towards your own “Bob Appreciation Day”, I will give you my list of “top Bobs”.

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I will begin with one of my favorites – Bob Ross. He is the man who inspired this entire post (non-sense though it may be), and has inspired many across the globe to paint masterpieces. His painting skills are not limited to but strongly include mountains and trees. Mountains and trees. That is what I remember most about his paintings. Mountains and trees. And he had this sort of soothing voice as he instructed you how to paint mountains and trees. He made you feel like, you, yes you, could paint a masterpiece like his. I loved him. He was great. And that hair…

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Speaking of hair, we’ll move on to our next Bob. Bobcat Goldthwait. My first knowledge of him was watching The Police Academy 2, which we had taped off TV and I watched it over and over and over again. As a small child, his voice and quirky mannerisms made me laugh. As a grown adult, it makes me uncomfortable. However, I have fond memories of watching Police Academy 2, and therefore, he made the list.

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Bob Barker. I watched The Price is Right constantly as a kid. My friend Leah and I were bound and determined to get on that show as adults. Granted, Bob has kind of a sketchy real-life character, but the guy I knew when I was little watching that show – he was amazing. He’d give you stuff. A washer and dryer. A car. A trip to Italy. All you had to do was answer his question correctly, and YOU WIN! How easy could that be? Yet people seemed so confused, and lost a lot. But he had compassion for them, and sent them on to spin the wheel for a second chance. Bob Barker was a friend to all…

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Speaking of friends to all – Bob Guiney. Now, you might all make fun of me for this one, but I have a soft spot in my heart for Bob Guiney. Yes, he pined for the Bachelorette. Yes, he kissed a boatload of girls when he became the Bachelor. No, neither of those situations worked out for him. And yes, he’s riding on the “reality show” success. But come on – that laugh? How can you not giggle when you hear him laugh? And he’s got a killer smile, you have to admit… Who knows, maybe I’m just a sucker for the curls and the dimples…

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Bob Saget. I’m talking Danny Tanner style here folks – another show (Full House) that was on the TV a bit when I was little… a show my mother wishes never existed. Anyway, Bob Saget amazes me, really he does. Do I think he’s an amazing actor? Not particularily. But this man has had his hand in so many projects, has quite the list of accomplishments, and seems to show up in so many different places. Plus, the guy is still doing stand up comedy which the Olsen Twins frequent on a regular basis – that’s gotta say something, right?

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Speaking of accomplishments… This guy takes the cake. Bob Dylan. I’m not even sure what I can say about Bob Dylan. I’ve never really gotten into his music, but that man is pretty stinkin’ talented. He is one of the great “Bobs” of all time, and definitely deserved to be on this list.

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Bob the Builder. I couldn’t forget him. What an adorable cartoon! Um, that’s basically the only reason he made the list… And, well, he builds things. That’s a definite qualifier…

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Last but definitely not least, Bob Sportsmonsfraggger. Who is Bob Sportsmonsfraggger, you ask? Well, even if you didn’t ask, I’m going to tell you. Bob is kind, has a passion for high school students, and even though he can be a tad creepy at times (ok, VERY creepy) he has a good heart and a good message. He brings us the truth of the Bible and encourages us in our walk with God by singing pop songs we all know and love, making it easier for us to know and understand the truths. Like, “Read My Bible One More Time” sung to Brittney Spears “Hit Me Baby One More Time”. He also tells us reasons to not have premarital sex. In the words of Bob, “I don’t want a baby, how ‘bout you? NO WAY!” A man who loves his mother, a man who survived malaria, and a man who can wear glasses without the lenses actually being in the frames – Bob is a true inspiration, and an example of how to live life. Thank you Bob, for everything you and everything you stand for (except your decisions regarding fashion).

There are many more “Bobs” that didn’t make this list, but are still important… I hope this has brought more Bobs to your attention on this here Bob Appreciation Day. So encourage your local Bob. (B. Sliw – I love you man – you rock, and I miss seeing you! I appreciate you on this Bob Appreciation Day). Rock on for the all Bobs we’ve come to know and love.

9.19.2005

anticipation

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I spent the day soaking in the sunshine and enjoying the crazy wind as it danced off Lake Michigan. The atmosphere was fantastic. Blue sky with killer clouds, wind that makes you shiver but allows you to vascillate between the warmth of the sun and it's own coldness, and people chillin' everywhere... It was one of the last days of summer, and people were soaking in every last bit of it.

As the summer draws to a close, I find myself in great anticipation of fall. I just finished reading the post of a good friend of mine, where she also describes the joys of fall. I adore fall... It is one of my favorite seasons. As much as I tend to curse the midwest, deeply desiring to live in a place with more consistent weather, the ocean, and well, let's just say it, NO SNOW, I must say that the season of fall is a definite perk to living in Wisconsin. And I believe part of my love for fall has to do with such great childhood memories.

I can remember going to Elegant Farmer as a kid, and picking apples with my mom and dad (that's me and my dad above). They had ladders and everything that you could climb, and for a 5 year old, the place looked HUGE, with orchards just waiting to be explored. After picking bags of fresh apples, you could then head to a little stand to create your own carmel apple, complete with whatever other toppings you'd like. A child's version of paradise! So great. There were also pumpkin patches, though I don't remember doing that much as a kid. Just great, great memories of cold days, colorful leaves, and apple picking.

Fall... What a great color on God's pallete...

9.17.2005

people who blog

You can't see me. I'm doing the "Happy Happy Joy Joy" dance. Here's why...

When I first started blogging, there were few other people I knew who had one. My brother was the first one I knew to enter the world of blogging, and he's the one who got me hooked. I remember when he first started it, I was like, "GEEK! GEEK!" endlessly taunting him. I did. I thought it was geeky. However, the more I read his blog, the more I wanted one. When I decided to take a road trip out to California, I thought it'd be cool to keep a journal along the way. Keeping a journal was not a new discipline for me, and a road trip would definitely provide good material. But then I thought, hey, what if people could travel with me? What if I could write from the road what kinds of things I was doing, thinking about, and experiencing for anyone who wanted to read it. That's when I decided to start my blog... and the phenomenon has stuck.

Here I am, like, a year and a half later, still blogging. I'm not sure why I'm so addicted to the idea. I know that when I started to write for Relevant Magazine and it seemed more people were reading my blog, I got even more excited to write.

But I want to spend a minute on talking about OTHER people who blog. Like I said, when I first started this whole thing, my brother was pretty much the only person I knew who had one. Shortly thereafter, he had a few links to other people who had blogs. I spent much of my time reading my brother's blog, and his friend's blogs. No one in my sphere of friends had one, so I spent most of my time reading theirs. Slowly but surely, more and more of my friends got into the idea of having a blog. One by one, they started to leave behind the same train of thought that I had about it being geeky, and give into the idea that it is an awesome creative outlet.

All of that being said, I would just like to welcome all of my friends who have recently decided that blogging would be a cool thing to do. I would just like to say that I still think this whole thing is a stellar idea, even though there are still some kinks to be worked out. I would just like to say, I love reading what is going on in each one of your lives.

Can I get a WOOT for people who blog?

playlist

Ok folks... A while back, I had posted a project that I wanted to try. My goal was to get ONE song suggestion from anybody who ever reads this blog to add to a "bloggers" playlist. I got a pretty good response, and have a decent playlist. It is as follows:

Sparks - Royksopp (suggested by Dave)
8:16am - 311 - (suggested by Justin)
Fire in the Head - Tea Party (suggested by Chris)
When The Dawn Breaks - Narcotic Thrust (suggested by Coloratura)
In Red - Lovedrug - (suggested by Joel)
The Trapeze Swinger - Iron & Wine (suggested by Kristy)
Someday - Nicole Nordeman (suggested by Katy)
Transatlanticism - Death Cab for Cutie (suggested by Parke)
Superman - Five For Fighting (New Album version) (suggested by Tom)
Solar System - Vigilantes of Love (suggested by Kim)
Listening to Otis Redding at Home during Christmas - Okkervil River (suggested by Scott)
Good Times - Edie Brickell (suggested by Odis)

Now, if I've missed your song, please forgive me and feel free to repost it. I am still taking suggestions (from people who HAVEN'T posted a song yet... yes, that means you can't post another song, Chris...). As you can see, I have a pretty good start to a playlist, but could use a few more. SO YOU STILL HAVE A CHANCE! Hahaha...

Anyway, I'd like to thank those of you who DID contribute to this little project of mine. I rather enjoyed it, and I think I only know one song on the list. There's a wide variety of sounds listed here too... So thanks one and all for posting! I'll have to do another one sometime soon. Maybe a themed one or something.

Rock on my friends.

9.15.2005

THWACIIW

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(I think I'm addicted to using visual aids in my posts)

I love childrens books. It doesn't matter what age the book is for, if it's "young at heart" I love it! This may sound simplistic or adolescent, or whatever other big word you want to come up with for it... But I love them! As I've mentioned before, if I had the opportunity, skill, knowledge (and money) to open a children's bookstore, I'd be all over it! One of my favorites as I have mentioned before is "Click Clack Moo - Cows that Type". Others on the list include "The Day I Swapped My Dad For Two Goldfish" (the edition I have has amazing illustrations), and "The Voice". "James and the Giant Peach" - loved it. Chronicles of Narnia - currently making my way through them. Nancy Drew books - I'm collecting the new, old hardcover versions of them (they're new, but they're in the old school style).

However, this book - The House With A Clock In It's Wall - I had completely forgetten about until just recently. In fact, I can't even remember what made me think of it, to be honest with you. But it came to mind the other day, and I decided I had to hunt down a copy. I can remember reading it as a kid (I was probably 10 or 11) and I can even tell you to this day exactly where it was located in the library. I remember when I was little thinking the cover was SO creepy that it had to be a good book. I remember reading it over and over and over again. The funny thing is? I don't remember any of the story, except for the obvious fact that there is a house, with a clock in it's walls.

I tried to hunt down this exact version (as shown above), but alas, I've only found newly designed books. I did find one copy of the old one on ebay, but it wasn't really worth it to me to go through the hassle of getting this version of the book. I did however, find a "best of John Bellairs" book at B&N, and decided to pick it up. Now, if only I could find time among my 4 novel-focused classes to read it!

Anyway, just a little nostalgia for you all this evening... I watched "American Graffiti" as a form of nostalgia today in my pop culture studies class, and I guess the nostalgia stuck with me the rest of the day...

9.14.2005

lament

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Let us take a moment of silence in lament... Lament over the fact that Sigur Ros' show in Madison is sold out. SOLD OUT! They're all the way from Iceland - not too often that they're here - and the show is sold out! AH! I'm SO not a happy camper about this! I was totally stoked to get to see them (provided I actually find someone to go with). They would be such an amazing band to see live... I would imagine a very magical evening in which I slept very, very well afterwards (they're music tends to put me to sleep - but in a good way!) But alas, I will not get to witness the magic that is Sigur Ros. I will have to wait again until they make the journey from Iceland to the States. I know you can't see my face, but I am pouting a great deal.

Ah well... Such is life.

I did pick up their new album tonight (as show above), along with Athlete's newest album (finally!), and an album by Neutral Milk Hotel (thanks to Jeff for the suggestion!) There are so many albums out right now that I totally want to purchase! New Death Cab For Cutie (I can't believe I actually haven't picked that up yet!), new David Gray, the soundtrack for Elizabethtown (I'm so excited to see Eastmountainsouth getting some exposure), and 30 Seconds To Mars has a new album out (I'm not super excited about it, but I have their first one and I'd be interested in hearing the second one). There were other ones I coveted as well as I was scouring the shelves at The Exclusive Co. However, the buck's gotta stop somewhere... couldn't buy them all. Slowly, I'm sure I'll accumulate more music than necessary. What can I say, I'm a music nut...

Still lamenting my Sigur Ros misfortune...

9.13.2005

thoughts

The past year has been an interesting rollercoaster of many emotions. Some of you know the story of the past year of my life, and all of it's intricate parts, and the ups and downs that go with it. Some of you don't. But no matter what the case, I've made a few observations that I'd like to share with you. These are not exclusive to my own journey as I'm sure quite a few of you have experienced this as well, and these are definitely not NEW observations - a lot of these are basic "duhs" of life, yet so easily forgotten.

1.) Anger is easier than grace. Grace sounds like such a magical term to me. It sounds like this beautiful, far-off promised land where things are right and true... Where wounds can be healed, relationships mended, and journies continued. But you know what? Traveling to this far-off promised land promises only one thing - hills, valleys, roads under construction, potholes, severe weather - you name it, you'll see it. But anger, anger is like a house... The reason I say this is I think about days when there is bad weather, or I know I have to drive through road construction. What would I rather do? Stay in my little house and pout about it. I'd rather stay inside, and talk about how I wish the gas prices were lower, how I wish it wasn't raining, and that I didn't have to go 10 minutes on a detour. But you know what? I never reach my destination doing that. I never can fully enjoy where it is that I wanted to go because I never went. Instead, I stay in my house, mad. And I think that's how it is with anger and grace. Grace requires the tough, treacherous road. It's not easy. It requires some pain & pride being swallowed. But unless that road is taken, you can never fully experience the promised land of grace. Instead, you'll be sitting in your house, wishing you had grace, and making every annoyance out of the path to it.

2.) We hurt most the ones we love the most. I remember back in high school, listening to a live Counting Crows album. There's a song that's never been released on a studio album called "Chelsea" that I instantly fell in love with, and would listen to a great deal. There is a line in the song that goes "The things I do to people I love shouldn't be allowed." I remember at the time, being a naive 16 year old, and thinking to myself, I wonder what he's referring to. I wonder what terrible things he's done, and why he's done them to the people he loves. But this line has never resonated more with me than it has in the past year. Often times I wonder why the ones I love the most, the ones I would lay everything down for the, the ones I would travel to the ends of the earth for, are the ones I tend to hurt the most. Most often, I think it's because they're the most forgiving. Most often it's because I don't think I have the possibility of losing them, so my actions won't have any detrimental ramifications. Absolutely an incorrect assumption, and it definitely has ramifications.

3.) Change is good. Some of you know, I'm a sentimental sap. I like to hang on to just about anything because it has memory and meaning behind it. I mean, I got pouty when we got rid of our front door because the sound of the spring screeching would no longer be there. That spring brings back so many memories of my brother and I darting in and out of the door during the summers. It's a sound that indicated someone coming home. I loved that sound. And I got all sappy about our front door taken away. How sad is that? Anyway, that will give you a little framework for where I'm coming from. I don't let go easily. To memories, to places, to objects, to people, to relationships. And I've had to readjust my life this past year as I've had to let go of a lot of things. But it's good. Moving ahead is good. We wouldn't be where we are now if our ancestors had said, "We like to walk, let's forget the wheel." or "Photographs of people will suffice... They don't need to be moving pictures." What if Martin Luther had never made the change in his life that he did? Change is good... It is. And I'm learning that. I'm no Martin Luther, that's for sure. But change is inevitable, and I'm learning to roll with the punches. Granted, sometimes I let those punches take a sucker shot to the stomach, and then gripe about it. But it's a learning process none the less.

These are just a few of the thoughts I've been having recently, and felt like sharing. I know they're pretty vague for those of you who don't know me super well, and that those of you who DO know me well probably know what sorts of things I'm referring to. But it doesn't matter what I'm referring to. These are situations that happen all the time - with everyone. Situations to choose anger over grace, to hurt those we love, and to accept or deny change. I didn't want to write about specific events because these situations are continuos for me. Everyday, I have to make these decisions. Every day I need to decide what kind of person I want to be. Every day I need to learn what humility and love really looks like in human form. And every day, I fall down and pick myself back up again. It's a continuous journey...

9.11.2005

farmland

So, I'd like to say that I pride myself on being a city girl - typically, I love the city. I love the giant buildings, the craziness of all the people rushing around, the wall to wall stores and shops, all of the smells of a city, the access to just about anything that comes with being in a city, the different "sides" of a city (downtown side, artsy side, touristy side, business side) and lots of other things. I have never lived in a city, but someday, I would like to.

However, despite my love for the city and desire to be a part of one, I think there's a special place in my heart for farmland. I drove around for a while this afternoon as I had a lot of thinking to take care of. If you don't know me that well, know that about me. I think a lot. Too much at times. As I was doing this, I was driving all over the town I grew up in. I have lived here in Wisconsin, which is full of farms for almost my entire life. As I was driving today, I saw things that brought a smile to my face. Silly things that most people wouldn't think twice about, but for some reason, I found endearing. A house with clothes out on a clothes line. Fields of stalks. A really strange looking scarecrow. Wagons filled with pumpkins for sale. Cows roaming about. I don't know... It just felt so great driving around through this landscape. Granted, cities are pretty cool, but it doesn't have the same feel when it comes to driving through it as this sort of atmosphere...

So, maybe I'm a city girl. Maybe I'm a country girl. Maybe it just means that I find joys in each of those surroundings. It'll be interesting to see where I head though once I move out next spring/summer. The city sounds so exciting, yet there's something so comforting about surburbia. Who knows...

9.10.2005

spam

Sorry folks, but due to spam comments, I've added a word verifcation function to my blog. I didn't want to only because it makes commenting a little annoying, but the spam comments are even more annoying. So, I hope you all continue to comment! Don't let the man get you down!

Um, it just felt right saying that there...

stupidity, swings, & saying goodbye

It was a night of stupidity, swings, & saying goodbye.

My evening started out with a good friend of mine. She had a massive craving for Grasshopper Fudge ice cream - the flavor of the day at good old Kopps. After her cone took a spill to the floor, and she purchased another, we made our way into a bizarre evening. I was in the mood for taking pictures, so we wandered around Waukesha taking random shots... Found ourselves at Target where I bought four different colored lightbulbs so that we could play with light in our photo adventures. We then made our way over to Starbucks to visit a friend working the overnight shift. It was there we engaged in a coloring contest with I swear the fattest crayons I have EVER colored with. Our evening was topped off with great boy-band music to which we created ridiculous dance moves... The best one being to O-Town's "All Or Nothing" (we had some killer dance moves and hand motions, I tell ya).

On the way home, I took a night drive as I often do when I have lots of thoughts in my head. Night drives are the best... Windows rolled down, good tunes, and brilliant stars out on back country roads. As I was driving, I started to think about how much fun I had had during the evening, and that it was an evening of sheer stupidity. We did things we never would have done normally, but didn't care that it was utterly ridiculous that we were doing it. It was the best feeling - kind of freeing and liberating. I was trying to imagine what else felt like that, and it hit me - swings. I absolutely adore swings. I'm 25 and still love to swing on them. There's something so childlike about it, yet, so theraputic. I don't know what it is. Something about them just makes everything that's bad in life seem to disappear. When you're up in the top position of swinging, you can see so much farther than in a ground position. I don't know... My night just seemed like flat out, childhood bliss, like swinging on swings.

When I got home, my night became a little more sobering. The sheer stupidity came to a halt, and I needed to shift into "adult" mode. I received an email from a friend which required a lot of processing on my behalf. I wrote a novel of an email back to this friend of mine, and while I was writing, I realized just how hard it is to say goodbye - especially when neither person involved were the cause of the goodbye. When an outside force causes two people to have to say goodbye to everything that once was, it almost seems harder than if it was brought on by one or the other. I don't deal well with change, and this is one change I strongly did not want to admit to... But it's very possible that saying goodbye to a certain situation has become a necessary evil. I'm not sure where things will go from here...

Well, I suppose it's pretty late - my little computer clock says 1:40. It's been a while since I've been up this late...
I promise to have a more uplifting and positive post soon. I just needed to do a little processing tonight.
Thanks for bearing with me.

Night y'all.

9.06.2005

clean-out

It's that time of year... Well, maybe not to the rest of the world, but in the life of the Wisconsin Dolan's, it sure is. Clean-out time. And not just of all the junk that has accumulated within our house, but other ways as well. As I'm sitting here, taking a little break (ok, procrastinating a little) on gutting out my room - a much needed process - in preparation for a fresh coat of primer and paint next weekend, I've been thinking about a "clean-out" in other areas too. My dad is going to do a detox thing, where all he eats are raw fruits and vegetables, along with supplimental shakes. He is doing that for 21 days to get out all of the horrible chemicals we put into our bodies every day. My mom has to change what she eats as well, so the Dolan pantry/refridgerator/cupboard will look drastically different in the next few weeks - lots of natural and organic foods. And I gladly welcome the change. A "clean-out" of my system is well needed, and welcomed.

I'm also trying to do a "clean-out" in a leisure sense. Didn't know you had a leisure sense, did you? Who knows why I just typed that... It just came out. Anyway, I have gotten into a nasty habit of watching way too much television, and spending way too much time on my computer just futzing around. I'm not saying that either of these in and of themselves are wrong in any way, but too much of anything is not a good thing. So, as school begins today which kind of feels like a "new beginning" - new class schedule, new work schedule - I am going to try to do a "clean-out" of things that I don't necessarily feel are a good use of all my time. Oh, every so often is fine. I mean, I have to do the usual blogging and check my email every so often. And of course, there's at least one or two TV shows I'll want to watch (24 in January can't come soon enough!). But I'm hoping to spend my time doing the things I love and should be doing, but am just not disciplined enough to get off my lazy butt an do.

We shall see where this new "clean-out" leads me. I'm hoping it'll prove a significant change, and hopefully a more productive semester. I'm excited for a new schedule and the changes ahead.

9.04.2005

1000

I realize this post will probably sound a bit narcissistic, but I just thought I'd share my excitement - I've reached 1000 profile views. I know that sounds lame, but it actually means that I have a fair amount of readers out there. Unless there's some weirdo out there who just keeps checking it 50x a day to see if I've changed anything. Hehehe...

Anyway, I realize that there's quite a few of you from all over the states. It'd be awesome to see where everyone is from! So, if you read this on a semi-regular basis, post a comment and let me know where you're from! Let's see how many different states we can get!

fancies

I feel as though I'm being a jerk for not writing about the Katrina disaster at all... My thoughts are still really jumbled about it, still processing, and to be honest, I have had so many different discussions, thoughts, and news stories thrown at me that I'm not even sure I could regurgitate something worthwhile at this point.

So instead, I shall start the first of the many thoughts I had while traveling out east this past week - that which I fancy. Two things in particular: children's bookstores and photography.

Children's bookstores... There aren't many that exist, at least none where I live. While in Cambridge, MA I came across this amazing Curious George themed children's bookstore. It was amazing! I fell in love with it instantly. It had books galore, toys, stuffed animals, little corners with fun carpets for little kids to sit on while they read, and a staircase that lead to downstairs treasures for the older kiddies. I could have spent hours in there. So many books and toys to look at! I found an amazing copy of the entire Chronicles of Narnia, and tons of books that I read as a kid like Ramona Quimby books, and Nancy Drew (but alas, no Bobsey Twins). Needless to say, this place was sheer heaven... Now, this may sound weird to some of you who don't know me. I don't know why, maybe it's my love for little kids and the fact that I love to watch them read, learn, imagine, and dream... Maybe it's because I've always been a sucker for cartoons and moral stories, but there is something so wonderful about children's books, and even more wonderful when they're all in once place. While I was in this bookstore, I had such a great desire to open up my own children's bookstore. This is not a new idea - I've shared it with a few people before. But this time, I even said, "Maybe I should start to take some business classes..." If you know even a little bit about me, this is HUGE because I'm not a business person in the slightest. But I'd consider becoming one if it meant I could open up my own bookstore... How amazing would that be?

Photography... While on vacation, one typically partakes in taking pictures of where one stays. I too participated in this vacation tradition, only, I didn't want to document where I was as much as I wanted to get some really artistic shots. Granted, I did not get as many as I would have hoped, but I got a few that I was pretty excited about. Over the past couple of days, I've been checking out some different Flickr accounts. I belong to a group of people who are readers of Relevant Magazine, and I must say, I'm totally impressed with their photography skills. So amazing... Some of them are absolutely genious. I have become greatly inspired to take better pictures... The one thing I'm struggling with though is how to find great subjects. Some of these pictures, I think to myself "I'm never in a situation where I could take a picture like that." For instance, I don't have any surfer friends, I don't know anyone who teaches ballet or has a little girl taking ballet, I don't know any good graffiti spots... I know, I know... I just have to hunt a little more, and become a little bit more bold with taking pictures. But I must say that over the past few days, I have become TOTALLY inspired to take more pictures, and to learn how to be a better photographer. Any tips would be greatly welcomed.

Those are my current "fancies". Just thought I'd share them for the moment... More thoughts to come in the next few days.

9.01.2005

home

Well folks, at 8:30 this evening, my feet crossed the threshold of my house. Praise the Lord! Don't get me wrong. I absolutely love to travel. Boston and Washington DC were great, and I had a lot of fun, but this time around there was something so great about coming home. And here I am. Home.

The next few days should prove to be relaxing and exciting... I don't have a ton planned which is great, and then a Labor Day picnic with my sister-in-law's family. Fun times, fun times.

I had some thoughts during my travels that I found myself too tired to write about, but hopefully I'll be able to convey some of those ideas in the days to come. Thanks to all of you who continue to read my blog... You have more patience than I could ever have! hehehe...

Have a good night one and all.

8.31.2005

DC

Today, we hit DC. There aren’t any great stories about the things we saw or the things we did today. We did almost all of the main spots on the mall and past the mall… The only thing we didn’t get to see that we wanted to was the tomb of the unknown soldier. Anyway, I’ll just let you look at some fun pictures I took. These are only a few of the 250 that I took – how crazy is that? Needless to say, the girl I am on this trip with probably wasn’t too happy because I was ALWAYS taking pictures. But here’s just a couple of the things we saw:

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We started and ended with the capitol… This was at the beginning of our walk.

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This was a scary sculpture we found as we were walking through the National Gallery of Art Sculpture Garden.

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Here is a piece of art made out of tiles that I thought was kinda cool.

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TONS of geese in the reflecting pool…

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This is one of my favorite memorials – the Korean War Memorial. I thought this was kind of a fun angle, even though the statues faces are a little creepy.

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This is the White House and the back of a tent where a woman has camped out in protest of the war. I believe that she had a son who died in the war, and I thought her signs were kind of interesting…

8.30.2005

10

All the fun had thus far in Boston came to a screeching halt this morning. Now, mind you, we’re back on track as we just checked into our Hyatt Hotel in DC (can you believe we’re in a Hyatt? SO FUN!) We just ordered a pizza, are watching Friends, and enjoying the fancy atmosphere… However, this morning, we were singing a sadder tune.

Around 9:30 this morning, I was going to pull the car around so that we could pack our stuff, check out and hit the road kind of early. However, come to find, my keys were nowhere to be found. I searched through everything but to no avail. I found nothing. I thought maybe I had locked them in the trunk. The night before, I had retrieved a few items out of the car, and with my arms full, I thought maybe I forgot to take them with me. Because I couldn’t find my keys, I had no other choice than to call a locksmith to see if indeed they were in the trunk. The locksmith showed up, unlocked my car, and I crawled into the trunk to unlatch it, only to find my trunk absent of my keys. I had no idea what in the world to do… And so, we decided to have a key made. Oh what an ordeal that was! We had to find out what the number combination was for cutting the key. I called Saturn Customer Service, I talked to a guy in the parts department, and five keys later, the locksmith finally had to call a dealership to get the right key combo. No one would give us the right number, The locksmith told me that it was intentional so that Saturn (or GM) would be the ones to get money. Anyway, this whole process took about 4 hours, and oodles of money… Let’s just say that when 2:30 hit, and we were in our car leaving Boston, I breathed a sigh of relief… Our only hope was that we would have no problem getting to DC.

And it was so… No problems. We made it to DC without getting lost! So great! Typically, I am really good at navigating and reading maps, but New England is a tad difficult to figure out – especially Boston. Once we got outside of MA, we were good to go. We drove through The Bronx (which was really the only city we were able to identify). We drove over what I’d like to believe (until we learn otherwise) was the Brooklyn Bridge (such an awesome bridge to drive over). Drove through Jersey, Delaware, and Maryland… And I’m happy to say we hit our tenth state of the trip today, not including Wisconsin obviously. 10. Illinois, Indiana, Ohio, Pennsylvania, New York, Massechusettes, Connecticut, New Jersey, Delaware, and Maryland.
All but Illinois and Indiana were a new experience for me…

So, no pictures today. I tried to snap a picture of the locksmith van as I was completely bored sitting in a crazy hot parking garage, but it didn’t really turn out. And we didn’t get any good driving shots. Ya’ll will have to wait until tomorrow, but I promise to have some good ones. We’re headed to all the “hot spots” of DC tomorrow. Our hotel is just down the street from the Mall, so we’re good to go.

Hope all is well with you all.
Rock on my friends.

8.29.2005

sites

(forewarning – LONG POST!)

Destinations: Salem and Harvard. We started out the morning by grabbing breakfast at this awesome little café down the street from our hotel – the Paris Creperie. It is this small café with Paris photographs, faux Eiffel towers with Christmas lights all over the place. Each individual table has a funky little lamp on it too… Great atmosphere. Great food. After we grabbed our morning crepes and one of the best cups of soy chai I think I’ve ever had, we made our second attempt at driving in Boston. We were a tad frightened because our drive in was not entirely pleasant, however, we were greatly surprised at how much we had already come to understand how the city worked, and found it not that difficult to maneuver around.

The first place we headed was Salem. It wasn’t entirely what we had imagined, but we enjoyed ourselves anyway. We did the Salem Witch Museum – if any of you are planning a trip to Salem, the Salem Witch Museum is not really worth the $6.50 for the presentation – it was pretty weak. However, at least we hit one of the “attractions”. We walked around down Essex street past the Peabody Essex Museum, and just kind of checked out the town at our own pace. We came across a few buildings of importance. The first being the first church which was built in 1692. The second is Town Hall, which is pictured below:

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Also, and this goes out to Chris my northern neighbor – saw this sign, and I HAD to take a picture… PAMPLEMOUSSE!

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After Salem, we decided we wanted to see Harvard. We made our way back to Cambridge, and were quite unsuccessful in finding parking. Due to the nature of the city, driving around finding parking was not a fun task. We saw that the red line subway was in the center of the city, and knew that there was a stop for the red line really close to our hotel. So, we headed back to the hotel to park the car, hopped the red line, and headed down to Harvard.

Harvard was so beautiful… We totally just soaked in the atmosphere, and even attempted to look like we were students. We found one of their many libraries (pictured below) and attempted to get in, but found that you need to have a student ID to get in. Blasted!

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We headed to a Harvard gift shop, picked up some souvies (mine included a hat/T-shirt combo), and walked around Cambridge. We went to a Curious George themed children’s bookstore which only confirmed my dream and desire to open a children’s bookstore (I’ll save that story for another post). We were soon met by a downpour of rain. Finding ourselves to feel like drown rats, we sought shelter from the rain in an au bon pain shop, where we ate fruit and waited out the rain. After that we hit “The Coop”, another Harvard associated bookstore/gift shop. After hanging around town for a while, we finally decided to head back. Before we got back on the subway, I took this shot of Cambridge at night… Not sure what it’s of, exactly, but thought it looked cool. Someone then asked us directions to the Coop, and we were actually able to give them! We felt like Bostonians!

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Finally, we headed back to our side of town, and headed out to dinner. We had decided earlier in the day that we needed to eat East Coast Sea Food. Despite the fact that I’m not a huge seafood fan, I thought, what the heck, I’ll give it a go. We had seen the Oyster House last night, and thought it’d be a great place to go. Little did we know that it is the oldest restaurant in America, and has some of the greatest food. The atmosphere rocked, and our food was unbelievable. I had pan seared haddock that was so yummy – and for me to say that about fish is a HUGE thing. All in all, great day! Loved it… Tomorrow, we head to DC… Good times had by all.

8.28.2005

self-tour

We walked around Boston today, just checking out the town. After a stop at the Starbucks across the street from our hotel, we headed out to check things out, not having a CLUE as to where anything was. We quickly found ourselves in front of the State building, where tour trolleys pick up people for tours of the city. Sarah and I, while trying to avoid looking like tourists, figured what better way to see the city since we didn't know our way around. However, when the driver of the trolley told us that it was $28, we were like, "Um, we'll think about it." We figured we could probably figure out a decent self-tour. He did however leave us with a parting gift, which became our treasured item of the day - a map of all the sites that we would have see on the tour. We were set for the day...

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The first thing we came across is this first picture - Boston Common. All these little kids were playing in the fountain, and I found myself with a deep desire to just sit and watch their uninhibited playful spirits. We watched all the people enjoying their Sunday afternoon, and then continued on our way.

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The next thing we came across - the Public Gardens. It was so beautiful. There were trees, flowers, statues and fountains everywhere. I took a bunch of pictures while at the gardens, but this one was my favorite. Now, if you were to ask me what the monument was actually for, I'm not sure that I would be able to tell you... But I just really loved this statue for some reason.

We went saw the original Cheers, some amazing churches, went to a pretty cool local bookstore/cafe, and ate at Stephanie's on Newberry, this semi-fancy restaurant where we had Sunday brunch on the patio. A great relaxing afternoon. Unaware of just how early things shut down in Boston on Sundays (most everything is closed by 7pm), we headed towards Quincy Market for dinner and evening activities. We got there just as things were starting to close down, but were lucky enough to have SOME entertainment - the Yo-Yo Man. This young guy was out in the square, doing yo-yo tricks. He attracted quite a crowd. While my initial thought was, "This is kind of cheesy" the guy was pretty humorous, and it was actually a pretty entertaining show. And all the little kids adored him! It was so cute! Here's a picture of him doing one of his tricks:

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Because most things were shut down, Sarah and I decided to eat some dinner in our hotel, and make it a night to just relax in the hotel wathing movies. All in all - a very relaxing day. Lots of things to see, lots of pictures taken, great food, great sites (the architecture here is gorgeous)...

Tomorrow should prove to be pretty fun... I'll post more tomorrow about the MA happenings. Ok, I'm going to take off. I feel like I should have some sort of "sign off" signature, like "Seacrest Out". Any suggestions?

MA

Here we are. Boston.

Yesterday, my friend Sarah and I packed my car, and headed out east. We left around 4am on Saturday morning, and after a few confusing directions by Yahoo maps, over $30 in unexpected tolls, and a crazy goosechase to try to find our hotel, we finally settled into our hotel by 1am Sunday morning, I can finally say WE'RE HERE! LOOOOOOOOOONG drive, but we made it.

We have the next couple of days to wander around MA... Check out Harvard, Quincy Market, Salem... Not sure what we'll do when, but hopefully it'll be a fun couple days of relaxing. Then, onto DC for a couple days.

I'll check in every so often and maybe even post a picture or two.
Hope all is well with everyone else out there.

Rock on my friends.

8.18.2005

freakish

why am I so intrigued, enthralled, energized, mystified, captured, whatever word you so choose to use, by something that is so utterly freakish and destructive?

I decided to seize the opportunity to write right now, in a moment of inspiration, of pure energy...

If you don't already know this about me, I'm obsessed with thunderstorms. Ever since I was a little kid when I had my very own weather station in a tree (of all places!), I've had this astounding fascination with storms. I'm not entirely sure why... While for most, sunshine brings happiness and joy, thunderstorms energize me. Seriously, I'm like a small child on Christmas morning when they come. Unfortunately we haven't had any really good storms this summer. And I'm totally bummin'.

I would, however, like to take this moment to make a disclaimer/apology. I realize that storms are immensely destructive, and have caused lots of families major heartache. That is the one thing that sickens me about my love for storms - that they are such destructive things. However, in some respects, I love it because it's only a small ounce of the amount of power that God has, and that to me is an absolutely fabulous thing to behold.

About 10 minutes ago, I wandered outside amidst a very eery setting. The sky was this mad shade of orange. I took a picture of it... of course, it doesn't really do it justice, but you can see a small sliver of blue through the crazy orange clouds. Within 10 minutes, the sky shifted to a midnight blue with purplish hues, about the fastest I have ever seen the sky change colors. Granted, I have seen storms roll in pretty fast, but that's just going from light to dark, cloudless to cloudy... these were completely different colors. WILD! Right now, it's very very still... I can only hear the hum of the power lines, and the slight chirping of crickets. Every so often, a quiet rumbling in the distance, and I can hear the weather station on the television downstairs... but these sounds are muted against the deafening silence that's outside right now. Usually, silence is so overlooked. But in a situation where you'd expect noise to abound, to have silence, it's unavoidably noticable.

My mom was watching the weather... I live in a city about 45 minutes outside of Madison, one of Wisconsin's largest cities. They were saying that a man at the local mall was picking up falling debris... It was mail, actual letters, that were addressed with Madison addresses. Baseball cards, bills, letters... all of these things, the storm had picked up and carried with it. I guess 12 houses were ruined about a half an hour from here. They were showing 6 different tornadoes on the radar.

And yet, all we have is silence.

I suppose I should be grateful. I mean, I could have been one of those people who's house was destroyed. I'm not wishing for that by any means. The wind has started to pick up a little, but still, now that it is dark, you would never know that there was a storm coming. It's silent, and still. I hope to see a great light show and the mighty roar of the sky, but that may just not happen. For now, I'll just continue to sit by my window, and let the pre-storm atmosphere linger in my room...

I'll try to post a picture later on this evening, and let you know if the storm ever unleashed it's wrath.

8.17.2005

missed

I'm sitting here listening to Sigur Ros, and thinking about how much I miss playing the piano. Not having a piano to play is not the main reason why I am saddened that I no longer have a "church home", but I realized about a month ago, not only will I no longer have a church to call home, but I will not have a piano at my disposal any time I so choose to play. Before, when I was feeling a bit sad, pensive, or just musically inclined, I'd head on over to my church and play my little heart out. God bless them for giving me church keys. No one around, with only one overhead light on, it became a hideout of sorts... I could play as loudly or softly as I desired... I could play the same song as many times as I wanted... I could even let my voice squeak a few notes out, with no one around to hear it... I loved it. Playing songs by ear, playing songs I created, or just sitting in front of the black and white keys... Nothing used to calm my nerves, eat away at my frustration, and jumpstart my creative energy like playing the piano... and I miss it.

and I simply must say, I'm incredibly addicted to
"Saeglópur" by Sigur Ros. all of their songs are
so beautiful, but this is my new favorite.
a bit more upbeat than stuff off their ( ) album.
but beautiful.

I gotta find a piano somewhere...

8.16.2005

plug

Ok... so this may be a shameless plug for people whose creativity and talents I admire, and whom I have appreciated knowing over the years, but if you're looking for any new worship tunes, you should check out both of these albums, as they are amazing.

"Changed" - Music at Mars Hill
This album features the writing styles of Aaron Neiquist and Troy Hatfield, both great singer/songwriters.
You can download songs from this album at:
www.musicatmars.com

"You Are Here" - Cindy Beier
Cindy is a good friend of mine, and this is her debut album. She sings a few originals, a song written by Troy Hatfield, and even a couple beautifully arranged old hymns. You can pick up her album here:
www.cindybeier.com

These two albums have been pretty consistently playing on my iPod, and I highly suggest checking them out.
Thanks.