L.M.

(photo taken from www.lorimckenna.com)

Recently, I have been slightly attracted to folk music. Ok, very much attracted to it. I'm not entirely sure where this desire came from. It's even borderline country which I swore I would never listen to (sorry for all you country lovers out there). There is something so magical about folk music. I really like the word magical. I use it a lot. But it just seemed so fitting for this post because I feel like folk music is just that - magical.

My current favorite is Lori McKenna. I know I've talked to quite a few of you about this obsession lately, but I seriously cannot get enough of her music. It's kind of weird how I stumbled upon her music. Every now and then, I read Zach Braff's blog, and he usually gives a music suggestion. One time he suggested "Beautiful Man" by Lori McKenna. I sampled it in iTunes at one point, but didn't purchase it. Instead, the first song I purchased of hers was a cover she did of Radiohead's "Fake Plastic Trees." Granted, I love that song, but her version isn't the greatest. Anyway, I then started to download some of her other stuff, and started to LOVE it. One of my favorite songs by her is "Stealing Kisses." I swear, if I ever get my say in a movie soundtrack, that song is going in it. CAMERON CROWE, IF YOU'RE READING THIS (hahahah... That's a funny thought) YOU NEED TO PUT THIS SONG IN YOUR NEXT MOVIE! The intro to the song seriously belongs in a movie! Other songs I have by her are "It's Easy When You Smile" and "Fireflies". I love Fireflies because it makes me think of being a kid, which of course, as most of you know, I rather enjoy. I love childlike things, and childhood daydreams. And this song is just that. Here's the song:

Fireflies
By Lori McKenna

Before you met me I was a fairy princess
I caught frogs, and called them prince
And made myself a queen
And before you knew me I traveled around the world
And I slept in castles, and fell in love
Because I was taught to dream

I found mayonnaise bottles,
And poked holes in the top
To capture Tinkerbell
And they were just fireflies
To the untrained eye
But I could always tell

Caused I believe in fairy tales
And dreamer's dreams like bed sheet sails
And I believe in Peter Pan
And miracles
And anything I can to get by
And fireflies

Now before I grew up I saw you on a cloud
And I could bless myself
In your name
And patch you on your wings
And before I grew up I heard you whisper so loud
Well life is hard, and so is love child
Believe in all these things

I found mayonnaise bottles,
And poked holes in the top
To capture Tinkerbell
And they were just fireflies
To the untrained eye
But I could always tell

Caused I believe in fairy tales
And dreamer's dreams like bed sheet sails
And I believe in Peter Pan
And miracles
And anything I can to get by
And fireflies

Before you met me, I was a fairy princess
I caught frogs and called them prince
And made myself a queen
And before you knew me
I traveled around the world
I slept in castles, and fell in love
Cause I was taught to dream...


Such a great song. So go, check her out. Lori McKenna. Yes, this is a shameless plug. But she's awesome. Check her out. If you like folk that is. And if you have any good suggestions for folk, let me know... I'm kinda new to the world, and suggestions would be greatly appreciated. Thanks!

continued thoughts

Continued thoughts on community...

I was looking through pictures of my Judson College days, and realizing how much I miss having a kind of community like that. Not necessarily living in a dorm, but having friends RIGHT there, to spend time with and share life with wherever and whenever. I went to a birthday party for my friend's one year old son the other day, and saw some friends I haven't seen in quite a while. I haven't laughed that hard in a long time, and it felt great. I saw a friend of mine last weekend who I haven't talked to in two years. It was so great to see her, and I felt like in some respects, we picked up where we left off. We had to fill each other in on what we missed out on over the past two years, but it seemed like it wasn't really two years that had passed by. And I just recently started emailing with another old friend from high school, and I love the fact that we were finally able to reconnect.

Which made me think... We are so unbelievably designed to connect with other people, and to have human interaction, it's amazing...

In my film class, we just watched "The Life Aquatic". Now, this movie got pretty terrible reviews, and most people I know hated the movie. However, this movie shows a great picture of that need for human interaction and connection. Throughout the whole movie, there is this distance between people. Emotions are very rigid and stone like, and used more for a comedic effect (example - Steve Zissou kissing the head of Estaban). However, by the end of the movie, there is this definite need for human connection and emotion. They are all experiencing something so amazing and beautiful together, that they can't help but reach out to each other (it's kind of like a "laying on of hands" scene - very interesting).

But isn't life mostly like that? That we're all experiencing something amazing and beautiful together, and long to reach out to one another? In "The Life Aquatic", Steve Zissou's best friend Estaban was killed by a Jaguar Shark, and he spends the whole film on a mission to find the Jaguar Shark. When he finally does see him, it's this beautiful creature, and the rest of them all feel like they are a part of something so huge. I think that's how I feel so often in life. I experience these moments that are so beautiful, and make me feel a part of something so huge, and I want nothing more than to experience it with a community around me.

Currently, I don't have that sort of community. I have people who I know and love, and spend time with, but none of them are really connected to each other, or a part of a larger group. I spend time with each of them individually, and do not have a "corporate group of friends" to which I belong. That isn't necessarily a bad thing. I'm not saying I need to be surrounded by 50 people in order to experience meaningful, and fulfilling friendship. But I am missing it. I'm missing being plugged into a church. I'm missing going on "group trips" where I get to experience the adventure with numerous people (which I hope to someday also be a thing that I experience with a family - you know, husband and kids type community). I miss sitting and watching movies with a mixed crowd where half of us are laughing, and the other half is like, "What? I don't get it?" I miss the joys that come from large amounts of laughter, as well as large amounts of tears.

I know, to everything there is a season... And I know in good time, I will once again be a part of a community. That once again, I will find a church to call home and this anxiousness and frustration with organized "church" will go away. I know that this is my current situation in life, and I'm ok with it.

There's just days that I miss it.

bookstore

I love bookstores. There one of my favorite places in the world. And I like all different kinds of bookstores. I typically go to Barnes and Noble a lot, just because it's the closest "big chain" near me, and if I'm looking for a book that's kind of hard to find, they have the largest selection. Every so often for a change of pace, I will drive out to Borders and check out their selection. But the bookstores that really tickle my fancy are the ones that have a little more personality to them. While Harry W. Schwartz is still along the Barnes and Noble and Borders side of things, it has more of a personality to it. My friend and I visited one on the east side of Milwaukee last night. While she filled out an application, I sat and read children's books. I highly recommend "Punk Rock Farm" by the way. The layout of this store is amazing though. I feel as though there are all these little areas you can just plop down in and read a book. We were in the kids section, and I grabbed like 4 different books to look through, and we sat on this huge plush couch, there were HUGE stuffed animals surround me as well as a lot of other toys (including a little stuffed Albert Einstein that I wanted really bad). It had SUCH a great atmosphere. If I was a little kid, I would have rather enjoyed myself. There is another bookstore downtown that I absolutely adore - well, I used to anyway. It was my favorite place in the world when I was in high school. Downtown Books. The fiction literature was all upstairs, and you had to walk up this SUPER narrow staircase to get up there. Once you were in the fiction section, there were all these small shelves that were really close together, and then there was balcony to which you could see down over the rest of the store. It was magical. I would tuck myself up there for a while and read different books to see which old books I wanted to buy. There were some great finds in that store, that's for sure. But I absolutely LOVE bookstores.

Which brings me to the point of my post. The more I think about wanting to open a bookstore, the more excited I get. The more I think about wanting to open a CHILDREN'S bookstore, the more excited I get. I mean, my friend was so awesome to appease me and look at all the books I showed her. "Cara and Ashara", "Punk Rock Farm", "Zathura" (did anyone see this on the Apprentice?), "Black Meets White", "M is for Music"... I was reading through them, and kept saying, "This is so great!" and "I LOVE this!" and she was like, "Man, you TOTALLY need to open a store."

So, that leaves me here... Loving bookstores, and wanting to open one. I suppose the time has come to start looking into what all goes into that. Owning a business scares the crap out of me. I have enough trouble managing my own money, let alone the money of a business. Although, maybe it would be different - I have managed other budgets before. But, maybe it won't be. All I know is I think I better start reading up on what it takes to start my own business and open up my own store...

world series

In honor of the world series that's going on right now, I thought I'd post a baseball-ish type picture. Granted, this is no proclamation of love for either of the world series teams (or a team that either my brother or I really like for that matter), but I found it while rummaging though some old pictures, and thought it would be fitting.

Go Brewers... I mean, go Astros... I mean, shoot, they lost to the Sox the other night... Go... Um...

Oh, nevermind... I don't care.

mos

Tonight, I met another music junkie. A whoo hoo. I actually got together with a friend of mine that I haven't spent time with in a really long time. She and I were friends in high school, and then we went to college together for a year and a half. She got married back in 2002, and we pretty much haven't seen in other in the past two years. But we reconnected last weekend, and decided to hang out tonight. She and I had a great time together, reminiscing about old times. I met her dog Doodle, her cat Vinny, and her turtle Dick Tracy. We talked about all sort of stuff regarding our lives, what shows we are addicted to, and she even showed me this weird video game she's addicted to. I think it's called Katamari? Anybody out there heard of it? Anyway, we were having fun getting caught up, and then her husband came home. The topic of music came up... Oh man. So great. So fun to find someone else with somewhat similar interest, but different enough to give me some good suggestion I may have never found. One of the bands he suggested, I'm totally diggin'. Mates of State. I think Troy Hatfield mentioned them on his blog a while back, but I never took the time to check them out. You guys, they're awesome. It's a husband and wife duo, and it's just keyboards/organ with drums. Sounds weird, but it's actually very, very cool. Very unique sounds, but they have some killer harmonies, and just a really good blend of sound. Definitely pleasing to the ear. So if you get a chance - check them out. Mates of State. They rock.

DDR

About a year ago, I was helping out with the junior high and high school ministry at my church. There is a little thing called Dance Dance Revolution that worked magic with them. Something about a dance-off just resonated so deeply with them that they found themselves playing it all the time, every week, without fail (well, at least the juniors highers).

I was walking to my car the other night. It was parked in the Union Lot at school, which is a covered parking structure. As I entered the floor where my car was parked, I could hear music blaring from someone’s car. As I got closer, I was able to see that it wasn’t just someone listening to tunes, but rather, a dance lesson of sorts. This guy and girl were attempting to teach two other people how to dance. It was great. I was highly entertained.

So many songs prompt you to dance… As I sit here and think about it, a whole slew of songs came to mind. “Move Your Feet” by Junior Senior, “Untitled” by Modest Mouse where they tell you to “Dance, D-D-Dance, Dance and go crazy!” “Rock Your Body” by Justin Timberlake, and the “shameful indulgence” I just can’t seem to get enough of lately, “Dance Dance” by Fall Out Boy.

There are shows on TV – “So You Think You Can Dance,” “Dance With The Stars,” not to mention all of the music reality shows (such as Making the Band and American Idol) that require large amounts of dancing. For years, people have mimicked one of history’s greatest dance icons, Michael Jackson. High schools have dances, there are business establishments dedicated to being a house for dancing, and you can’t tell me that if you hear a good beat, your body isn’t in SOME way responding to it – whether it be breaking out your Napoleon Dynamite moves, or simply tapping your foot.

Movement, to some extent, is inevitable when it comes to music. I once had a friend, in sincerest honesty, look at me dumbfounded, unable to understand my statement: “I don’t like to dance.” He obviously loves to dance, and was completely baffled that someone would actually say they didn’t. I’ll say it. Typically, I don’t like to dance. It is awkward. Makes me uncomfortable. And I just don’t find it fun. Maybe that’s because I’m a bad dancer. Maybe it’s because I grew up thinking it was “bad”. I don’t know… All I know is, I don’t dance.

However, that doesn’t mean that I don’t like dance. I’m absolutely fascinated with it. I love to watch all sorts of dance… I remember torturing myself through the horrible movie “U Got Served” just so I could watch the amazing dancing. There’s something so cool about the way people can move their bodies to a specific rhythm and make it look artistic and beautiful.

Dancing… What a crazy, but artistic notion. Ballet. Tap. Hip-Hop. Interpretive. African. Modern. Polka. Jig. Square. And even video-game-induced. So cool.

you're it - no tag backs

Ok, so I got tagged... Again. So this time I claim, NO TAG BACKS. hahaha

My friend Emily got tagged and didn't know who else to tag, so she changed the rules up a bit. Here are her new rules:

This time, list 5 places you'd like to spend your weekend. For extra fun, add what you would do if you could be there (or, who you'd bring along).

1.) LA - I'd go to a restaurant called Tagine & spend hours upon end sitting on the shoreline

2.) Chi-town - visiting some of my favorite peeps down there

3.) Boston - to see all the places I missed the first time I went

4.) NYC - never been there, always wanted to go. I'd definitely hit up the Conan O'Brien show

5.) Seattle - another place I've never been, and always wanted to visit.

I'd love to put somewhere far away on there, but well, if it's only for the weekend, I'd spend a good chunk of it flying if I went overseas. If I could travel anywhere though it'd be between England, New Zealand, and somewhere in Africa.

Alright, in keeping with the game, I guess I'm supposed to tag new people. Therefore, I tag - with the new "where'd you like to go for the weekend" rules:

K.Finn
Kaydo
Sunny
Chris H.
Parke

joy, part one

This post was inspired by an idea that both just.in and k.finn expressed on their blogs a while back. They went through a list of their top 100 joys in life, and I thought it was such a great idea as it allowed readers of their blogs to see a little bit of who they are. And not only that, it was just a cool way to give a little shout out to the creator of those “joys”.

So I would like to join in on the fun of the “joy list”. Here are my first 50. They are not in any order of importance. More like, the order they came to my head.

1.) Thunderstorms
2.) Late night drives with the windows down and the tunes cranked
3.) Watching a kid eat an ice cream cone
4.) Understanding God through creation
5.) The leaves changing colors during fall
6.) When a kid doesn’t know the words to a song, and makes them up
7.) When an adult doesn’t know the words, and makes them up
8.) Starburst jellybeans
9.) Coloring
10.) Apple picking
11.) Watching a dad play with his children
12.) Seeing my parents being loving towards each other
13.) Seeing my bro & sis-in-law being loving towards each other
14.) A good music conversation
15.) Late-night talks about “Lost”
16.) Rhyming conversations with people (“Rapping,” if you will)
17.) Playing in the rain
18.) People watching
19.) Hanging out with high school & junior high kids
20.) Pojo’s fashion sense
21.) Looking through people’s family photos
22.) Christmas time, and all that comes with it!
23.) Large bodies of water – ocean, lake, river, bay, etc.
24.) Sunsets (um, I don’t see too many sunrises)
25.) Road trips
26.) Laughing and crying simultaneously
27.) Seeing Scripture in a COMPLETELY new light
28.) A letter from a distant friend
29.) Girl talk
30.) Blue Moon ice cream
31.) Unexpected free time
32.) Daisies
33.) Walking barefoot through sand
34.) Playing the piano
35.) Listening to someone else play the piano
36.) Watching someone open a gift
37.) “This is how we met” stories
38.) Seeing a friend be able to master something
39.) “Getting lost” out in nature
40.) Catching fireflies
41.) Band jams
42.) Mix tapes (though now, I suppose "playlists")
43.) Having quality “coffee talks” with friends and family
44.) Reading a good, challenging book
45.) Calvin & Hobbes
46.) Drinking cocoa or cider after playing in the snow
47.) When a good friend asks “How are you?” and means it
48.) Randomness
49.) A little kid learning to read and reading out loud
50.) Hugs

Ok… stay tuned for Joy Part 2 to come sometime in the near future.
There’s plenty more to add…

tagged

I got tagged... Mr. Drew Brown tagged me. So what does that mean? Check out the rules...

THE RULES: List five songs that you are currently loving. It doesn't matter what genre they are from, whether they have words, or even if they're any good, but they must be songs you're really enjoying right now. Post these instructions, the artists, and the songs in your blog. Then tag five other friends to see what they're listening to.

Here are my songs:

Stealing Kisses - by Lori McKenna
Saeglópur - by Sigur Ros
All These Things That I've Done - by The Killers
Around the Clock - by The Rocket Summer
Merchants of Soul - by Spoon

Ok... Those have been the "most frequently played" for me lately.

Now, for the people I'm going to tag...
I choose:

Vicky Brown
Dave Sandell
Meghan Forness
Justin Wise
Brandon Brown

elizabethtown

Do you ever have those moments in life, where you look at something, and say, “That! That right there… That is what makes life great”?

That was the feeling I left with tonight. Cameron Crowe has a way of creating these moments. Moments you want to be a part of. Moments we’ve experienced. Moments that hit us each in different ways. Maybe Cameron Crowe movies don’t do that for you, but they do for me.

And Elizabethtown is no exception. Can I tell you how much I loved this movie? I loved it for so many reasons. I wish I could write about it more in depth, but I know there are a few of you out there who are super excited to see it, so I don’t want to ruin the experience for you. But I loved this movie.

However, the feelings I left with were both good and bad. Like I said at the beginning of the post, it makes me say, “That! That is what makes life great.” And while true, I think that the mix of feelings is because there were elements of it that I could recognize in my own life, and elements that I saw were not a part of my life. But I wanted them…

I am anxious for more people to go see this movie. Especially music lovers. If you’re a music lover, you’ll DEFINITELY appreciate this movie… Cameron Crowe always does such a beautiful job with the music. So great.

But for now, I’ll leave you with this last image… It was one of my favorites from the poster, along with the picture of Orlando holding an urn and an American flag. But for some reason, I absolutely loved this picture… Maybe it’s because I’ve seemed to have a bit of a one-track mind lately…

P.S. - Cameron Crowe is my music-loving hero!

new to the library

Well friends, as was decided a while ago, I’m keeping a music integration within my blog. Music is such a huge part of my life, so it’d feel kind of weird to leave it out of the normal mix of things. Maybe if it gets really bad, and I find that it’s ALL I can talk about, then I’ll start a separate music blog. But for now, the music stays here. So, rest assured Dave, you only have to check ONE blog, so that you won’t “get confused”.

Well, here's what's new to the music library:


Augustana – All The Stars and Boulevards
I purchased this album a few weeks ago. I had downloaded their song “Stars and Boulevards” a while back when iTunes was offering it as their free song of the week. I really liked the song, and decided to sample the rest of their stuff. I fell in love with the song “Boston”. I am a sucker for piano, and that song hit me just right. The rest of the album is pretty good… It’s not what I would consider to be musical genius, but it’s definitely a “feel good” listen.


David Crowder Band– A Collision
This is my most recent acquistion. I’m still not sure I’ve digested it fully. The one thing I absolutely love about The David Crowder Band – their blend of musical sounds, and their ability to lead their listeners to the foot of the throne. Their ability to lead worship is astounding. However, at times, the lyrics are a bit strange – childlike, if you will. For instance, there is one song where he sings “Forever, and ever, and ever, and ever, and ever, and ever…” and keeps going on for quite some time. The song is a good, head bopping song – definitely gets the energy going. But at times, makes me feel like a high school student back in youth group. This album has sound bite interludes with things like whistling, speeches and phone conversations which makes the album seem uninterrupted, and the album works very much like a story. It has a great continuity throughout the album, beginning and ending with “the lark” (you’ll know what I’m talking about if you listen to it). Overall, I rather enjoy this album – but I’m still in the process of letting it settle.


Matisyahu – Live at Stubb’s
I have yet to pick up this album, but I’ve downloaded a couple songs from iTunes, and I’m pretty stoked about it. For those of you who are unfamiliar with Matisyahu, he’s a “Hassidic Reggae Superstar”, according to his website. Basically, it’s this reggae meets rap type music… and he’s Jewish, so it is definitely injected with that vibe. If you’re a fan of reggae, or even just interested in some really well done, artistic music, check him out. And for any of you who live in the Chi-town area, he’s playing at the Metro next month. Stellar.

Ok, that’s all for now… More music musings to come in the near future. Maybe I’ll post a new playlist (and no, Chris, it probably won’t include Alice).

Rock on my friends.

disguise

(Photo taken by Jeffrey Worthen.)

I laughed when I saw this picture – and I laughed hard. Not entirely sure why – just tickled my funny bone, I guess. Another reason why I laughed was because I just purchased this jar-like thing from Pier One that’s in the shape of a head. Basically, it’s this clear, glass jarhead. When asked why I purchased it, I tell people, “It was simply too weird and too cool to pass up.” So, when I saw this picture, it made me laugh because it made me think of my jarhead.

As funny as this picture is, as always, it got me thinking… Seems as though a lot of visuals get me thinking. A sunset. The ocean. Watching a little kid attempt to eat an ice cream cone. Seeing a tear fall down someone’s cheek. Why not add an oddly disguised mannequin head to the list?

I love this disguise though… the crazy shaggy hair, the fake mustache, the skullcap (can I tell you how much I love skullcaps, by the way?). It’s such a ridiculous disguise, isn’t it? I mean, if you saw someone walking down the street wearing such items, you might think, “Do they really think their disguise is working?” If anything, you might think the opposite – how maybe it draws attention, instead of diverting it. Sometimes I wonder how often we do that – how often I do that. How often do I wear the “I’ve got everything together” disguise, when it’s so utterly obvious that I don’t have it together? How often do I mask my struggling spiritual welfare with Sunday morning pew attire and a smile on my face? How many times do I think I’m camouflaged, when really, everyone around me can see through the gaudy façade? How many times do I leave the house looking like this mannequin head?

These questions lead me to two different rabbit trails about this whole idea of wearing a mask. First, the idea of being an image bearer… I was thinking about this concept – that I am Christ’s image bearer. SCARY! I’ll be perfectly honest; the thought of being Christ to someone else is a tad daunting to me. I like being one of his sheep… but being a representative of my shepherd, that’s a different story. Maybe that’s one of the reasons I sport the disguising digs. I’m afraid of what I may or may not represent.

But the thing that stuck with me the most is just how much my not-so-master of disguise plan interferes with community. Granted, bearing my soul to the world isn’t the ideal option either. But I often wonder what our mannequin head-like behavior does to authentic, transparent community? What happens if we don’t allow ourselves to be known by our brothers and sisters? What might we be missing out on? How is community hindered if we all come together wearing some form of disguise? What if we left our wig, fake mustache, and skullcap on the mantle, adorning the mannequin where it belongs? What would happen if we let go?

These are all questions I have been mulling over lately. I haven’t arrived at any answers. To be honest, the thought of this sort of community is both exhilarating and extremely frightening all at the same time. I mean, the thought of being able to openly and honestly “bear one another’s burdens”, and grow together as a community is such a freeing thought, but the thought of having to let my guard down, to get let go of the security found in the wig, mustache & cap? Not altogether settling. I’m not sure what to do with all these questions…

All I know, the disguise isn’t working anymore…

school daze

In an avoidance of my homework, I decided to color this Garfield picture. My mom read my blog a while ago where I wrote about coloring and how much of a release it is. The next day, I got home, and hanging on my door in a plastic Walgreen’s bag were two coloring books and a brand new box of crayons! I have a million crayons, but this was a brand new box. SCORE! Well, I decided to take advantage of this new acquisition. Due to no cable/internet at our house for the time being, I decided that coloring would be a good distraction from my homework. But I also decided that I would color something to express how I felt – and this was the picture I chose. School Daze. It not only reminded me of how I feel while sitting through all of my classes (this semester is a tough one to bear) but this picture also reminded me of one of my earliest video ventures. Granted, I have mentioned before my attempt, along with my creative sidekick Leah, to create a television station. (If you don’t know the story, ask me about it sometime… It’s kind of amusing.) However, this picture reminded me of my first real video – that would be shown to an actual audience, and that was supposed to serve an actual purpose.

When I was a senior, I was on The Student Body Council – referred to as ASB (All Student Body). I was a facilitator – basically, the doer of grunt work. My friend and I were given a project – to video tape all the events and craziness that ensue during the week of homecoming, and put a compilation video together. At the end of the week, it would be shown at the Homecoming banquet (hey, I went to a private school – we didn’t have dances!)

So my friend and I set out to tape everything we could. However, a few problems existed.
A.) Neither she nor I had ever made a compilation tape before.
B.) We found that people (especially girls) hated to be video taped.
C.) No one would humor us, and do fun things for the camera… completely stoic.

We ended up with barely any entertaining footage… Therefore, we decided to try to compensate when it came to editing. We started out the video with footage we shot at my house. We taped up a sign on the wall that said “School Daze” written all crazy-like. While that was on the screen, we edited in an audio clip from Space Ghost that we thought was hilarious. If you’ve ever listened to Space Ghost, it was a Brak sketch where he talks about hiring a monkey to take notes for him in class. We thought the clip was suiting, and thought ourselves geniuses to put this clip at the beginning of our video. Little did we know that no one else in our high school was even aware of what Space Ghost was, nor did they catch the jokes in the sketch. We then proceeded to show clips from the week, set to the song “Crazy Times” by Jars of Clay, and this song by Plumb (the name as escaped me, sorry). I remember at the time thinking how cool our video turned out. Now, I cringe to think about the fact that I was that impressed with my lack of ability.

It’s so funny that as we age, we look back on the things we did in our younger years and laugh. My journals from high school are a riot, and yet really immensely embarrassing. As I write this, I’m wondering about this blog. Will ten years from now, I look back at it and think, “What in the world was I thinking?” In ten years, will I look back and think, “Wow, what immature things to think about and write about?” Will I say to myself, “Who ever thought of the blog anyway? What a silly notion!”

blogs

I wrote an article for relavantmagazine.com a while back entitled Taming The Technology Trap. While I believe the angle I presented - that technology can cause damage to human interaction, I also agree that techonology can seriously aid in human interaction. It was a tough article to write because of where I was at when I wrote it. I was struggling with how much I was sucked into all my "gadgets" and was seeing them as being destructive to human interaction. Plus, when you write those kinds of stories, being "wishy-washy" doesn't go over so well... People are going to disagree with the article no matter what, so I'd rather them disagree with an actual stance, instead of my fence riding.

But back to this idea of technology, more pointedly, blogs. I've had numerous conversations with people about the world of blogs and their functions. There have been speculations as to whether it is some sort of narcissistic act. It can be. There have been speculations that it is a sort of "public journal". It can be. There are other thoughts that it's a "foot in the door" to getting published. Could be. All of these thoughts can and may be true. But I'd like to share with you my reason for blogging, and what I absolutely love about this concept.

When I first started blogging, I had no idea why I was doing it. I knew that I was going on a road trip to California by myself, that I wanted to take my laptop with me so I could journal along the way, and that it could be a cool thing if some of my friends and family followed along with me as I traveled across the US. That was the initial start to it. Shortly after that, it became more of an online journal of sorts. I pretty much just wrote what I was thinking, and a few (we're talking like 3 or 4) of my family/friends read it. Then, after I became an intern at Relevant magazine, and a lot more people started frequenting my blog, it became an ego thing. I tried to post more important things, my writing style shifted to try to sound more professional than journalistic, I tried to become more humorous, and over all, the look and feel of my blog shifted a bit. I was also hoping that as more and more people landed on my blog, the more and more networked I would become.

That brings me to now, where I see a little bit of all of these, but there's still something more that makes doing this worthwhile. Community. Now, it's definitely a weird form of community, I'll give you that, but it's a form of community none the less. It's kind of interesting... When I talk to my friends that are here in person with me, and I'm telling them about a person I've met either via Relevant, Flickr, etc., it's weird because I'll say something like, "My Relevant friend..." or "My Flickr friend..." like somehow they haven't achieved the title of "friend" because I haven't met them live in person.

This whole blog community thing has been a strange one, but amazing. I've met people from all over, with lots of different backgrounds and interests, with different careers, different dreams and aspirations, and different lifestyles. And it rocks my socks off. I love some of the conversations I've had with people. I love asking them questions, and conversing back and forth. I love that we've been challenging each other with ideas, thoughts, and questions about God. I love the fact that I have people praying for me in different cities, states, and even countries. I love it that even though I've never met (and may never meet) some of these people, that I am able to feel comfortable having a friendship with them, and sharing our lives together.

But there's another aspect beyond meeting new people, and having new friends and that is the ability to have community with people who I already have strong relationships with, but with whom I don't share the same space anymore. I get to read about what's going on in their life, and they get to read about what's going on in mine. We can comment back and forth, challenge each other, and grow together without having to be in proximity to one another. I know that just recently, there has been a particular circle of my friends who have really gotten into visiting each others blogs... It's so awesome...

While I don't think that blogs by ANY means should replace face-to-face human interaction, I think that it's another angle of human interaction that has the potential to be huge. The impact it could have spiritually is a whole other post... But I just wanted to write a little bit about my appreciation for blogs today. For so long, I felt like such a geek for having one. Then, I felt egotistical. Now, I just feel blessed.

Thanks to all of you who come here, and allow me to be a part of your world as well.

smith

Blog community, meet Smith. Smith, meet the blog community. Smith sits on top of one of my bookshelves and looks down upon my room... So why am I writing about my sock monkey?

The reason is this. It's not really about Smith, but more about what Smith represents. I've been thinking a ton about my future. You'll have to bear with me the next few months as I question my future, and wonder what it holds. The fact that I'm graduating in May causes me to think a lot about it. And my sock monkey (among other things) has caused to me consider something - kids. Granted, I'm nowhere near having my own kids, but I've been thinking a lot more lately about how much I enjoy kids, and I enjoy their activities. My sister-in-law has been telling me this for quite some time, probably ever since I met her, that someday, I would work with children. I never bought into the idea. I think all the babysitting I did as a young teen kind of turned me off to the idea. I was a nanny for a while, but that wasn't the greatest experience either. But I keep coming back to this idea of working with children... Even in wanting to open a children's bookstore... Sure, it was initially about my love for children's literature, but the more I talk about it, the more I get excited about getting to interact with kids... Watching them learn, seeing them imagine... So great.

So Smith seems a bit of a constant reminder of this thought. I began to think about what sorts of "careers" I could pursue in working with little kids. Day care doesn't seem to interest me that much. Maybe working in ministry somewhere with kids? That seems like it'd be too many meetings, too much planning, not enough interacting.

The thought that keeps occuring to me is teaching. For a while I had thought about teaching English to high school students, and even about teaching at a collegiate level. However, the thought of teaching little kids seems kind of appealing. Like, what if I were to become an art teacher for kindergardeners? My cousin's husband does that for a living... He's so gentle and seems like he has such patience. But how fun would that be? Or what about teaching music to little kids? I remember being in like 3rd grade, and getting my first "recorder". So great - my parents were probably annoyed to death by it though...

Anyway, I know my "career interest" seems to change on a weekly basis. There's just so many things that interest me! Therefore, I'm using this as a sort of sounding board. Maybe I'll eventually land on something. But I love it when some sort of new interest is sparked - so thanks Smith. Thanks for reminding me of the funness (and yes, I've made that a word) that children can bring, and keeping an open mind to a possible future working with kids.

soul junction

soul.juntion

Check it out. It's a blogging community composed of myself, just.in, dave, j.cav, and kfinn. We're not entirely sure where it's going to go, but we thought it'd be cool to go together. so take a spin.

"I've got soul, but I'm not a soldier." - the Killers

lost

Ok, so I was waiting for kay.do or drew.brown to post on the show "Lost" first, but, well, neither one of them are on the ball. So, I am going to stop waiting, and write about it myself.

This will just be an introductory post... I haven't really written any major spoilers, but other people might give stuff away. SO IF YOUR NAME IS DREW BROWN - IF YOU'RE READING THIS AND YOU HAVEN'T WATCHED ANY FROM SEASON TWO YET, STOP READING! AND GO WATCH THEM ON KAYDO'S TIVO! And if you're not named Drew Brown, but you haven't watched any of the 2nd season, that goes for you too.

So, if there are any of you out there who are Lost fans, and have been watching it so far, what do you think of the following?

- The theory that they are in purgatory
- Desmond's role
- Walt: real, or ghost?
- "The Others" - good or evil?
- What the "experiment" is all about?
- Will Locke's dad somehow play into it?
- AND WHAT THE HECK IS WITH JIN?

These are just a few of my ponderings... I'd love to know who out there is a fan, and theorizing with the rest of us geeks.

poll

Well, I've decided to close the poll... It's been at the same number of votes for a while now. It looks like it's a tie between those who say they don't care what I do with regards to posting about music, and those who say they like the integration. So, music will remain a good portion of my blogging experince on this here rain of wonder blog! I'm kind of glad, to be honest with you... I like having all sorts of random stuff on my blog, and taking away the music element would make it feel off balanced or something. At least, to me it would.

So for now, the music stays. No new music blog.
That having been said, coming soon: Augustana, David Crowder, and Matisyahu

music blog

I was having a conversation with my brother, and I was telling him that I feel bad for the amount of blog space I use to write about music. He suggested the idea of starting a seperate music blog for people who were interested in my musical musings. So, I thought about it, and it sounded like kind of a good idea. I do however, like the fact that I write about a mixture of things on this blog, and wondered if it might be lacking a little if I take the music element out of it. Bottom line - I don't know what to do.

So, here's where you come into play. I'd like to hear your thoughts. Below is a poll... You can vote and let me know what you think about a seperate music blog. Let the voting begin...

I like hearing your thoughts...

coloring

This post is sort of inspired by a post found on Justin's blog (see link to the right). He wrote a post about the purpose of white crayons. However, this initial conversation turned into another conversation about coloring in general. Amidst the comments was the question, "Who still colors?"

Well, I would just like to that I still have appreciation for this child-like artform. In fact, it wasn't more than 2 or 3 weeks ago, that while waiting to talk to a friend who is a barista at good old Sbux, my friend and I engaged in a coloring contest. Granted, we didn't have much to work with. The only books that were there were Barney coloring books, and we had these monsterous crayons to try to color with (it's no wonder kids can't stay in the lines - these crayons were gianormous!) Anyway, I cannot even tell you how much fun I had. Despite the fact that my friend and I were hurling insults at one another as to who's picture was better (side note: mine won), I haven't had that much fun in a long time. I have such great memories of coloring from when I was little, and it definitely has not lost it's fun as an adult. I do believe, that I shall have to make a regular occurence of coloring. It was so relaxing, and so much fun. You should try it!

But this then led me to think about other things that are child-like in nature that as an adult I still enjoy. Swings, as I have mentioned before. Night games... I know that being 25, I should probably not like running around in the dark, with dark clothes on, reaking of bug spray, hiding in trees, about to pee my pants from nervousness and excitement mixed together, and chasing after people who are trying to capture my flag, but I still have a soft spot in my heart for night games. Maybe I'm just destined to continue working with students so I get to keep playing games like Capture the Flag and Kick the Can - cause I love to play them!

Let's just say, I can't wait to have kids!

So how about you guys? Any child-like things you still engage in and find fun as an adult? Chutes-n-Ladders anyone?