10.30.2004

jones, bell & mclaren

I was reading the most recent post on Tony Jones website just the other day. Tony Jones is the author of a book called "Postmodern Youth Ministry" (as well as other books I'm sure) and has an involvement with the Emergent church group. In his most recent post, he was talking about an article written by a guy named Andy Crouch that was recently in Christianity Today about Mars Hill, Rob Bell, & Brian McLaren. I was reading all the responses and thoughts on the Crouch article, and found the overwhelming amount of frustration and quick defenses unreal! So, I decided to read the article. It was kind of interesting. If you'd like to read the article, you can click on the title of this post, and it'll take you to it. You can then read all the responses on Tony's blog if you so choose...It's kind of interesting, and I wished I had gotten in on the action earlier.

I had a conversation with a friend of mine a couple days ago about my frustration with the whole "modern" vs "postmodern". Why do there have to be titles? Can't we just say, "We're connecting with God in a new way." and leave it at that? I don't know. I think that there are definitely some different ways that this upcoming generation seems to want to worship and connect with God. I think some of those ways may go against what we would consider to be fundamental or modern. However, to give it a new category, a new title, and create a new form of division is unneccesssary. I'd like to believe that a so-called modern and so-called postmodern could co-exist in the same place. It looks to me that creating these new lines, new categories of postmodern vs. modern is only creating division, instead of inviting one another to learn and journey together. I struggle with creating this new denomination (isn't that, in essence, what we're doing) and I hope that it doesn't cause a division like the charasmatics from the conservatives, the armenians from the calvanists, the whatevers from the whatevers...I feel like it's a slippery slope, and sometimes I wonder if I'm the only one that feels that way. I definitely identify with a lot of the "postmodern ways", but that doesn't mean I consider myself postmodern. I don't think I'll ever be fully postmodern, having grown up in a modern society. So why can I not embrace new ways as an old way person, and not be crucified or recategorized for it?

Just some light thoughts for a Saturday afternoon...hehehe...

If you want to check out Tony Jone's website, you can check it out here:
http://theoblogy.blogspot.com

rain

There's something about rain that is so unbelievalby comforting...Am I the only one who thinks that, or are there others? A few thoughts came to me tonight as I sat and listened to the rain start to come down...

Judson Rain Dances: When I went to Judson College, I had a few roommates who used to love to play in the rain with me. My girl Sara, Emily and Kristy. The four of us were just a few rain rats, and would go running around outside in the rain (even if it was lightning outside - I know, not the smartest). We would run all over campus, and I remember one of my favorite spots to run around would be by the athletics building - in the parking lot. There were these HUGE pot holes that would fill up with water, and they made the best splashing grounds. There was also a huge dip in the grass in front of the chapel that created the best natural slip n' slide known to man. We would just run, throw ourselves down and glide across it over and over, getting grass all in our clothes and in places that aren't really mentionable. But it was the greatest feeling. Running around in the rain. Nothing mattered. It didn't matter if you were wet, had grass all over you, had a test to be studying for, or had had a horrible day. That rain washed away all of it. Everything seemed to magically disappear when it rained...

Some of the greatest songs incorporate rain: "Raining in Baltimore" - Counting Crows. Such a great song. "Why Does It Always Rain on Me?" - Travis. Such a fun song to bop your head to. "No Rain" by Blind Melon. That song has so many memories attached to it, it's not even funny. And all I keep thinking about is some little girl in a Bumblee Bee suit. I'd like to see the Bumble Bee Girl on one of those "Where are they now" shows. And "London Rain" by Heather Nova. Ok, I know that's a cheesy Dawson's Creek-ish type song, but hey, I like it.

The "Rain" Nooma, by Rob Bell. That is, I think, my favorite Nooma. Everytime I reach a period in my life where I'm like, "Wow, I feel really distant from God" or there just feels like there has been a ton of "rain" in my life, I break out this Nooma because it is such an awesome reminder about how God wants us just the way we are. He wants us to come to him broken, our hearts bleeding wide open in front of him, no inhibitions, you know? And that he'll be there whispering, "I love you buddy. We're going to make it. Dad knows the way home."

So is this a fairly thought-filled blog to be posting at 1:30 in the morning...yeah, kind of. And I know that my entries have been a bit more reflective lately...I'll try to write something a bit more light-hearted and comical in the days to come. I'll have to share my car accident/funny politics story as well in the next couple of days.

But in the mean time, I'm going to enjoy the sound of the rain...such a great sound. Thanks for listening to my thoughts on it.

10.28.2004

things to whoop about

ok, bad title for a blog entry.

But I didn't know what to call it. This is just an entry with some random things to check out...

New U2 video for Vertigo - if you roll your mouse over the title of this entry, it's hyperlinked so you can watch the video! It rocks the casbah!

A book I had recommended:
"Stop Dating The Church" - by Josh Harris

Another blog I read told me that the 24 Season 3 DVD set is coming out in December - not that many of you are into it. But I'm SOOO excited, and I have to get caught up on Season 3 before Season 4 comes out in January.

Lord of the Rings - Return of the King Extended Edition comes out December 14th. Check out the EE trailer at
http://www.lordoftherings.net

Ok, those are my tidbits for the day.

10.25.2004

luggage

Tonight I watched the Nooma entitled "Luggage". For those of you who don't know what a Nooma is, they are these short, 10 minute films that function as mini-sermons. The "preacher" in the Noomas is Rob Bell - a pastor of a church called Mars Hill up in Grand Rapids, Michigan. He has created these artistic ways of looking at life - visually, and scripturally. He presents some amazing thoughts that dig into the fiber of your very being. I have yet to watch a Nooma that did not move me.

Luggage...This Nooma could not have come at a more opportune moment. It's funny how God knows exactly what we need to hear, when we need to hear it and how we need to hear it. I think I could have had every one of my friends tell me exactly what Rob Bell did. But there's something about hearing it from someone completely detatched from the situation that makes it sink in that much deeper. I am having this struggle right now - a battle of self, if you will - in dealing with some issues that are going on in my heart. I have "carried" these feelings and thoughts around with me for so long, that I feel myself becoming exactly what I had vowed I never wanted to be. I have allowed myself to dwell in thoughts that need to be released. I have carried around my luggage for so long, that I almost forget it's luggage, and that it can be left behind. It becomes an appendage, rather than luggage. Such an amazing visual in the Nooma - the idea of luggage. But there is a whole other aspect to the Nooma that I can't really get into because I don't want to ruin it for any of you that want to watch it.
However, I was just feeling very convicted tonight about the things that I hold so tightly too - grudges, anger, rebellion, etc. that God is saying, "Hey. I can take care of it. Let go."

Anybody else dealing with some luggage that seems attached at the hip? :)
Hehehe...Thanks for letting me share. It's not often I have to huge convictions going on at once. Like I said, that God, He's a funny one...knows what we need, when we need it...even if it seems like overload.

But thanks God...for still teaching me.

catching up

this will be the first of two thoughts today...it seems God does not have limits on how much he chooses to teach you within a day or two...

On catching up...I met with my high school girls small group yesterday. We were small, which initially made me sad. However, you know the verse...Wherever two or three are gathered, God is there...Ok, so that's a bit of a paraphrase, but you get the idea. We talked about all sorts of stuff, when suddenly, it hit me ton of bricks "I've been trying to play catch up." I was talking about my statistics class mostly (which I am currently failing due to my own lack of motivation). However, it seriously hit me - and hit me hard. So often, I don't understand what is going on in my life - just like I have NO CLUE what's going on in statistics. Sometimes, I am baffled by the events and challenges God brings about. I sit there and go, "Well, now what?" God asks me to do my homework...Spend time with Him, pray about it, spend time in the Word, etc. Just like Min Chen says about keeping up with my statistics homework. But I don't understand either of them. So what is the easiest thing to do when you don't understand something? Avoid it - avoid it like you would avoid the plague! However, the ramifications of this avoidance is that, come exam time, one tries to cram it all in, retaining very little, and doing poorly over all. How often do I do this in my walk with God? I believe altogether too often! I don't understand why something exists in my life - whether it be a situation, people, sin issue, challenge, struggle - whatever label you want to put on it - and I walk away from it entirely - or stuff it down. The problem is, when it becomes imperative to work through the situation, I try to "cram" my way through it, leaving me feeling a sense of urgency followed by failure. Why do we do this? Why do we skimp out on our "homework" when we know the end result is going to be this shallow and skimmed over version of Christianity? I don't know about you, but I believe it's a mixture of laziness and fear. I'm too lazy to work through the issues. I'm too lazy and fearful to deal with the pain that may come with it. So, I avoid it. And then, when push comes to shove, I skim over the material, and end up giving God a half-assed attempt at loving him and following him. Pardon my language - I don't usually use swear words because I think we have a dictionary full of overly flowery words that can be used instead. However, that word just emphasizes the severity I think lies at the heart of this issue. It just seemed to fit. I was thinking about how often we as college students will find excuses as to why we're not doing well in school. I've used the excuse that my teacher doesn't speak English very well. Does that limit me from learning the material on my own, or finding myself a tutor if I don't understand it? Nope. I've heard other students say, "But you make it so hard." However, if you really think about it, how much of it is really on our own shoulders? I had to take a good hard look at the amount of "homework" I've been doing lately, and how often I play this game of catch up. I don't want to play catch up any more. It won't be easy, and it will definitely be a stretch, but I want to learn every day. I want to be filled up every day. I want to be passionate every day. Can I get an Amen? :)

Just some thoughts to chew on.

10.23.2004

ok, now!

It's a little late to be posting, so it may not make the most sense

However, this evening I took in the movied "I Heart Huckabees". This is not a movie I would recommend to most, as the language is quite rough, and there are a couple "scenes", However, this movie had me laughing - and dang hard! Jason Schwartzman (Rushmore) was really good, but I believe the highlight of the film for me had to be Mark Wahlberg. Yes, I did indeed say Mark Wahlberg. He was so brilliant in this movie! His character was so great, and somewhat differen than roles he has taken in the past. Such a great character...As far as what the movie was about...Hmmm...Good question. I have no idea. It was very "existential" in ways, exploring the ideas that everything is somehow connected, and made up of the same matter. It also explored the idea that the world is cruel and that nothing is connected, and we are alone in the universe. It also explored the idea of numming any sort of thinking/feeling by hitting each other in the face with giant rubber balls "ok, now!" This movie was bizarre, it was humorous, it was witty, it was dark, it was a whole slew of things all in one. Like I said, it's not REALLY a recommendation, but if any of you DO by chance see it, let me know...It's quite interesting.

Side note: Almost saw a brawl happen tonight...Felt bad for not doing anything to help the situation...there were fists thrown, and many unrepeatable words said...It was like a bad car accident...As bad as a fight would have been, couldn't stop watching.

Random thought for the night: Do you ever wonder if the things that erk you the most about someone/something, are the things that are a part of your own nature? For instance, if I get SUPER frustrated with a gossip, do you suppose that I may have the same problem and just don't realize it? Or if I can't stand a compulsive liar - is it possible that I struggle with it and am clueless about it? I was struggling with some "erks" tonight, and then began to wonder if maybe I manifest them as well, and am just unaware of them...Kinda frustrating, but also a possibility? Dunno...just a thought.

10.12.2004

bubbles

I was sitting in the UWM union this morning, thinking about recent conversations I've had with people. I was remembering the other night when the topic of "bubbles" came up. Now, I'm a huge fan of bubbles, so I obviously got excited and suggested the event of blowing bubbles sometime in the near future. Those around me snickered at my childlike behavior, as they should have, but I was dead serious. I love bubbles. Don't know why, I just do. So while I was sitting in the union killing time due to a class that was cancelled, I decided to break out my journal. I began to draw bubbles on the page, and thought, "Wow, it's been a while since I've drawn anything in my journal, and one of the first things I decide to draw is bubbles. How juvenile." However, it was here that I had a bit of a revelation. Yes, it seems as though God can use even the most simple of things to catch my attention (for instance - duck butts - a post from a while back).

As I was drawing these bubbles in my journal, I began to think of the qualities of a bubble. They are extremely delicate, and only last for a few moments. However, they are incredibly beautiful. The have this faint rainbow strewn across them, and are extremely shiney. How fun! But I began to think about the beauty of them in comparison with the time that they last - not very long. They are also so unbelievably delicate. You can't grab onto one. You can't hold it and keep it forever. If you're lucky, one MAY land on you, but it doesn't last for long. It then hit me that this is so often how beauties in life are. God gives us these amazing gifts that are so fragile, so delicate, and we try to grab them and hold on to them for dear life. I have a few situations in my life that are like that right now. I say, "God, this is such a good thing, let me hold on to it!" and I feel as though He's saying, "It's a moment of beauty to let you know I'm here. There will be more to come in the future. But enjoy it for the time being, and then let go." This hit me pretty hard, as I tend to have a REALLY tight grasp on a few things in my life. But they're bubbles...They're delicate, momentary ways that God allows me to experience Him. They are ways for Him to say to me, "I'm here." However, if I begin to hold on to those bubbles, I'll become more intrigued with the bubble, than what it represents. It reminds me of a sermon a friend of mine once gave. He said that so often God gives us handles with which to grasp him with. However, sometimes we fall so in love with the handle, we become completely satisfied with the handle, that we forget what the handle is to.

So, bubbles...A simplistic thing that God used to catch my attention this morning. I think it's awesome how he wires us up to learn things so differently from one another, yet is so faithful to show us himself in all those different arenas. I'm such a visual learner (again, as we learned from the duck butts), and God is constantly faithful to show me through those things.
Rock on.

Resfest

For those of you film junkies out there, check out this website. It is for Resfest - a digital film festival put on by Res Magazine. Res Magazine is this really artistically done digital media type magazine. They've got all sorts of goodies in it! I highly recommend checking into it! Resfest will be held in a while mess of cities all across the globe, and will be in Chicago December 3-5 at the Chicago Museum of Contemporary Art. I think you can buy an all access pass for like $65 bucks, but you can also buy tickets for individual screenings which range from like $8-10. I'm quite excited as I missed it last year, and I hope to make it out there this year. So, just an FYI for all you film junkies that read this, and live close to Chicago.

10.07.2004

kite surfing

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v124/HazeyJane/kitesurfing1.jpg

So, I'm quite fascinated as most of you know with surfing...But I saw for the first time this summer - kite surfing. I love surfing, and I love kites. What more could you ask for? The kite kind of looks like a parachute, and the board kind of looks like a snowboard and they use the kites to gain speed & give them quite a bit of air in order to do tricks. It's quite fun to watch, and it's become quite a fascination for me. As I drive to school, I go down the shore of Lake Michigan, and there they are. How fun! So, i just thought I'd share about my new found fun-ness...

I put a link above for a picture of kite surfing...I have a feeling it won't actually show up in my blog. I'm not sure how to put a picture in my blog. But you can at least check out the website and see a fun picture of kite surfing.

10.06.2004

brain fizzle

humph. I haven't posted in a while. I don't have a whole lot worthwhile to post. I feel like I had a brain fizzle. Not too entirely sure what that is, but that just seems to be the most fitting description of how I feel right now.

I'll do some deep thinking in the next couple days, and come up with something profound. In the meantime, I leave you with this: "Click Clack Moo - Cows That Type" is an awesome book that teaches children to be manipulative. I highly recommend picking it up. Hahahah...Acutally. It's a great book. I love it. I'm slightly obsessed with children's books lately.

But I have my homework set out for me...Expect a semi-intellectual entry coming to a blogspot near you.

Rock on my friends. Rock on.