geek

I don't know about you, but I'm a total movie geek. I love watching all sorts of movies: from your silly Will Ferrel movies, to cheesey girl movies, to animated cartoon features, to artsy indie house flicks. However, over the past couple of years, a lot of movies have been made that I just haven't taken the time to see. When the Oscars came around this year, I had not seen one film that was nominated. That is just sad. I used to LOVE watching the Oscars, and would be rather familiar with each nominated film.

So, as I headed into the summer, I decided that I wanted to get serious about getting caught up on films. I created a list that contains nearly 60 films that I would like to watch. Trust me, this list could continue to grow. Each time I go to the movie store, I find at least one or two more to add. Despite the fact that it might take me a while to make my way through 60 films, I am determined to see them all within the next year (on top of whatever else comes out). That means 5 a month off my list. I should be able to do that!

But my list seems to keep growing. Tonight alone, I went to the store and came back with 5 more to add to the list. YIKES! However, I'm also excited to watch all the movies I have listed. Some of them are movies I should have seen, but never did. Some of them are recommendations from friends. Some of them are ones that I found in the store that I thought looked interesting.

I love films, and I love having a good knowledge of them.

In the weeks since I've finished school, I've gotten 8 films under my belt. 8 films in roughly three weeks. Not too shabby if you ask me. 8 down, 52 to go.

(photo taken from Wikipedia)

remember

My dad and I were watching a Memorial Day Concert on PBS, where they went through each war and remembered the soldiers who gave their lives and those who fought in each one of our wars. As the music swelled, so did the tears in the eyes of each soldier present at the concert, each member of the audience who was there to remember, and the eyes of both my dad and I.

I can't even begin to understand war. I can't even begin to understand what it means to have the freedoms that I do. I have never lived somewhere where I DON'T have these freedoms, and so often, I take them for granted. I can get frustrated with whatever is happening in the government, I can agree or disagree with war...I can feel and think a lot of things. The truth of the matter, each of these individuals gave up their comforts, gave up their time, gave up being with their loved ones, and even gave up their lives in order to preserve my ability to think and speak my mind about such things.

Tomorrow, we wake up on a day that is set aside to remember such individuals. It is a day that I never used to take seriously. It used to be about barbeques, hanging out with family and friends, and getting a day off work. While it's great to have those things, Memorial Day has come to mean so much more to me over the past couple of years. The picture above is a picture of 3 of my friends - 3 sisters - who served in Iraq together. Two of them made it home. One of them did not.

Tomorrow, I will remember all three of them. Tomorrow, I will remember my friend Rachel who I've known and loved since I was 13 - a girl who I spent most of my adolescent years wondering and dreaming about what life would be like as an adult. A girl who has inspired the creative side of me, and who has always amazed me with her own creative gifts. Tomorrow, I will remember her sister Charity, who I have very fond memories of playing night games with, singing with, and cracking jokes with. Charity told (and probably still tells) the greatest stories that are highly animated, and extremely humorous. I remember when she first told me about her now husband, Tony. She was so ennamoured with him, convinced she would marry him, and was extremely animated while telling me about it. I have a fond memory of that moment. And tomorrow, I will remember Michelle, who gave her life serving her country. Michelle was one of those unique individuals who had a gentle spirit, an overabundance of love, and a joyful heart. I can recount many times us trying to learn to swing dance, quoting many movie lines in British accents, and being just plain silly. These three girls are my heroes, and it is them, along with the many others like them, that tomorrow, I will remember.

Thank you to all the soldiers who have served and protected us.

crazy

Was the season finale of Lost crazy or what? Seriously, one of the best shows they've done. I love the fact that some of our questions were answered, and yet, 50 more were raised. There were so many elements, so many plotlines, so many emotions... The episode was so creatively charged (no pun intended).

Kudos to the Lost creators and producers for a job well done.

Brilliant.

three

RAWR!

Yesterday, my dad and I only made it to one place, but it was TOTALLY worth it. Located in the middle of nowhere, in Marshfield, Wisconsin lives a couple named Clyde and Nancy… and their odd collection of metal friends at Jurustic Park.

The picture above is one of the many metal creatures Clyde has created. As we made our way through his garden of friends, Clyde approached us warning that we could only take pictures if we promised not to scare the creatures away – he didn’t want a stampede. He proceeded to give us a tour of his garden, and had quite the schtick to go with it.

He was a riot. He had names for each of his creatures, including the genus names. There were complete stories/descriptions behind the creations. It was absolutely amazing. Below are a couple more of his creations.





His wife is also an artist, but her specialty is glass and knitting. She does all sorts of blown glass – ornaments, buttons, jewelry, and critters – but also does knitting from scratch. She has a friend she buys sheep’s wool from, spins it, dies it, and knits is. She’s extremely talented, and a total sweetheart. The two of them were two of the coolest people, and I feel honored to have gotten to experience their artwork. One of the best stories we heard was one Nancy told to us. She said she had a group of 5th graders at Jurustic Park, and when they got back to school they were to draw their favorite creature and write a story about it. Clyde and Nancy received this amazing card (which they had hanging on their wall) made of some of the drawings, and the students sent them their stories which she kept in a scrap book. SO FUN! How cute! She said they were all extremely creative, and some of their drawings were amazing. She also had a poster up of drawings that a group of mentally challenged people had done that were brilliant. Some of the drawings were so good – you would have never guessed that the artist struggled mentally. My heart was so happy to see such great artwork with such awesome stories attached to them.

It was so fun to be in a place where imagination
and creativity run wild.

two

We started off the morning with a six pack of beer.

Yes, you read that right. A six pack of beer. The world's largest, in fact. Located in LaCrosse is the world's largest six pack. My dad and I headed there to snag a few shots before we headed out of town. The largest six pack in the world contains 22,200 barrels of beer (688,200 gallons). It is enough to fill 7,340,796 cans and could provide one person a six pack a day for 3351 years. Below is the picture of our morning six pack.



Moving along, we headed to Galesville in hopes of finding the original Garden of Eden. Don't think it was in Wisconsin? Well, Reverend D.O. Slyke sure did. In fact, according to the book Weird Wisconsin, he made a bold statement saying that there was no way anyone could prove that this town in Trempleau County WASN'T the original Garden of Eden. Um, I will give him this... the town is definitely beautiful. But as to whether or not it was the original Garden of Eden... Well, I'm sure you know what I think about that. Below is a picture of the statue erected to honor the vision and dream of D.O. Slyke.



My dad and I got a little distracted by a picture we saw in the "Garden of Eden" pamplet we picked up at the Galesville Library. On the back of a pamphlet was a picture of this bridge that crossed a river - one of those old rickety wood & wire bridges that sways when you walk across it. Though slightly disappointed by the height of the bridge (it wasn't nearly as high above the river as we imagined) it was still a fun little side trip to our Garden of Eden stop. Below is a picture of me in the middle of the bridge, pretending that I'm about to jump over the side.



Dunn County provides a tale of it's own as well. Elk Mound is not only a memorial attributed to the dead rural postal carriers of Dunn County (it's true... that's what it's for... the only memorial of it's kind in the nation... go figure), folklore also has it that a dragon is burried beneath Elk Mound, guarding some form of hidden treasure. As we drove up the narrow road to the memorial, the sky got dark and the wind picked up, adding a great deal of "atmosphere" to the tower. In my mind, I imagined just some small stone tower... Little did I know how creepy it'd actually be. It was pretty beat up and worn down, with a fair amount of graffiti and the stairs were rusted and rickety. It was great... So, we took a whole mess of pictures. Below is a picture where you can see the whole structure.



We then headed to Minneapolis, MN (our little detour from Wisconsin) and hung out in a little district called Uptown. We ate dinner at Chino Latino where we had one of the best meals we've had in a long time. We also enjoyed a couple martinis. My dad's was so cool because it had dry ice in the bottom of it, causing it to steam and bubble. Very fun. I don't have a picture from there (they're on my dad's camera) but it'll be up on Flickr at some point in time.

Day two down. Two more days to go. Still have some cool things to see. More to come...

one

A few months ago, my dad asked me if I'd want to go on a roadtrip with him. Seeing as how my dad and I had never been on a trip, and we don't really see each other that much, I thought it'd be an awesome opportunity to hang out with him. So, I agreed, and we began the process of deciding where to go.

After some consideration - consideration that included The Badlands and Niagara Falls - we decided that we didn't want to go somewhere far away and spend the majority of our time in a car. While we still wanted to do the "roadtrip" part of it, we also wanted to see some things. That's when we came up with a unique idea...

About a month ago, our next door neighbors showed us a book entitled "Weird Wisconsin." It's filled with all sorts of novelties, weird attractions, local legends and best kept secrets. We decided it might be interesting to check out some of the places listed... and so that's what we decided to do.

Today marks day one of our roadtrip. We first visited House on the Rock in Spring Green, and then we went to Glarner Stube - a restaurant located in New Glarus that is known to have the midwest's largest urinal. Next on the list was Dr. Evermore's Sculpture Park. We then landed ourselves in La Crosse for the night where we saw the World's Largest Six Pack.

I've put a few pictures below. Unfortunately, I had some problems with my camera in the transferring process... For whatever reason, there was a glitch, and I lost the last 17 pictures, including the ones from the sculpture park (which were my dad and I's favorites!) So, even though I'm incredibly bummed we lost those pictures, I figured I'd still post some other ones for your viewing pleasure.


This was taken at House on the Rock. It was a bridge-like room called "The Infinity Room." The design of it was pretty cool, and it had a stellar view.


This also was taken at House on the Rock. It's my dad and I in a mirror in the Blue Room. It turned out pretty grainy because it was extremely dark inside the room. But I still thought this was kind of a fun picture.


House on the Rock - the AMAZING carousel. It had over 20,000 lights, and not one of the figures was a horse. It was absolutely breathtaking! I've never seen anything like it. This picture isn't the one I got that I was really excited about. I lost my two favorite carousel pictures in the transfer. Stupid camera. But, this one will at least give you a feel for all the crazy colors and lights.


I decided to spare you the picture of the urinal. It was pretty gross. And, it was slightly disappointing because it's only about 4 feet tall. But, it was a great restaurant. Extremely tasty New Glaurus Spotted Cow Beer. So, I thought I'd include a picture of Glarner Stube. And I mean, with a name like that? I couldn't leave it out.

I'll put up all my pictures up on my Flickr account
within the next few days.

For now, I'm off to bed.
Busy day tomorrow on day two of the Dad & Tory roadtrip.

graduate

Well friends... the time has finally arrived. This evening, I took my last undergraduate final. My career as an undergrauate student has come to a close. I'm done. Finisimo! Technically, graduation isn't until Sunday, but since I'm not going through the ceremony, I'm officially declaring myself a graduate. I can't believe that after attending multiple schools, changing my major a bunch of times, and taking roughly 2.5 years off, I am finally able to say that I am a college graduate. But I am. I'm done. I now have a degree.

And it feels good.

(photo belongs to chris2k at sxc.hu)

heysátan

I thought I would post something on a bit of a lighter note. Granted, the majority of you don't really have much interest in what I'm listening to, but for the two of you who do, I would like to present you with my most recent playlist. I have acquired a bit of new music over the past few weeks. However, I find myself pulling out some old tunes as well. So this is currently what I'm listening to... And no, the title of the playlist does not read "HEY SATAN" though that's what it looks like. It's actually pronouced hey-sow-tahn (I think), which means "The Haystack." What do you expect... it's Icelandic.

Anyway, here's what's tickling my ears:

"Heysátan"

Busting Up A Starbucks - by Mike Doughty (thanks Gina!)
Everyday - by This Providence
Steady As She Goes - by The Raconteurs
Good Morning, Hypocrite - by Electric President
Eyes - by Rogue Wave
You Come and I Go - by Hotel Lights
East From West - by Denison Witmer
From the Morning - by Nick Drake
Thirty Three - by Smashing Pumpkins
The Sun of the Soul - by Trevorside
Goodnight and Go - by Imogen Heap
Calculation Theme - by Metric
I Fall Apart - by Film Dialogue
Bright As Yellow - by The Innocence Mission
Lovestruck - by Iko
Sad & Beautiful World - by Sparklehorse
The Sun & The Moon - by Mae
Auto Rock - by Mogwai
Hemipode - by Amina
Heysátan - by Sigur Ros

help

The title of my post makes me think of the Beatles song "Help," and I must say, it's quite fitting in multiple ways.

Why is it that so often, I can't get my actions to match my words, or even what I am thinking about? Why is it that taking action seems so hard?

I realize I've written a lot about this lately. What can I say? I've had numerous conversations about this recently, and you can see from my blog posts throughout the past couple of months that I've really been wrestling with a lot of social issues. So bear with me as I continue to wrestle and talk through some of this. I've noticed how easy it has become to TALK about social issues - to talk about compassion - and yet, for whatever reason, not get myself to actually do anything about it.

It should not be this way.

If love, compassion, and change was what really compelled me, I wouldn't even have to think about it, right? If I am really, truly living the way Jesus wants me to, I'd like to think I wouldn't have to put forth so much effort - wouldn't it just come naturally?

I know that as humans, we have tendencies to be selfish. We have tendencies to want to be comfortable, in control, and safe. However, I know individuals who are shattering that mold. Individuals who seem to be living out what they're saying, and they seem to be doing it effortlessly. And my question is - how do I get there from where I am - where it seems it's always a conscious thing, never acting purely out of love and compassion, but rather a mixture of those with guilt. How do I get to a place where my efforts towards change come out of pure passion and effortless devotion?

Any ideas?

Is passion something you either have or don't have, or is it something you can cultivate? Is it something that the more you make an effort, the less of an effort it will become over time? I don't know... All I know is that in my brain, and in my words, I seem to be saying, "I want to help people." But what do I do on a daily basis that actually reflects that? And what are my motives for wanting to help people? To feel better about myself, or because I genuinely love and care for them?

Maybe I'm the one that needs help!

2

Some of you may know that I have an immense interest in learning about personality types, gifts, birth order, etc. (there are times where I think I should have been a psychology major). A while back, a friend of my brother's sent me to a website to take what is called an Enneagram test - which is basically just a personality test. At Thanksgiving, my brother, sister-in-law, and her family got into a discussion about our results. My sister-in-law is a 7, which by nature is extremely proud of being that number. When I explained to her that my not being proud of being a 2 came from actually BEING a 2, it launched us into an even more interesting conversation.

With trying to figure out what I want to do once I finally finish school this May, I have been exploring some of these things further. What kind of a personality do I have and where would it best fit? What are my gifts? What are my passions? What sorts of things will help me? Hinder me? As I thought about all of these things, I decided to revisit the whole Enneagram thing, and found some very interesting descriptions. I thought I would share some of them with you because it's unbearably accurate, but still REALLY interesting... Well, at least to me... If it's not interesting to you... well, you can just stop reading any time your little heart desires.

Ladies and gentleman, I present to you the profile for an
Enneagram #2: The Helper
(found at www.9types.com)

Helpers are warm, concerned, nurturing, and sensitive to other people's needs.

How to Get Along with Me
- Tell me that you appreciate me. Be specific.
- Share fun times with me.
- Take an interest in my problems, though I will try to focus on yours.
- Let me know that I am important and special to you.
- Be gentle if you decide to criticize me.

In Intimate Relationships
- Reassure me that I am intersting to you.
- Reassure me often that you love me.
- Tell me I'm attractive and that you're glad to be with me.

What I Like About Being a Two
- being able to relate easily to people and to make friends
- knowing what people need and making their lives better
- being generous, caring, and warm
- being sensitive to and perceptive about others' feelings
- being enthusiastic and fun-loving; a good sense of humor

What's Hard About Being a Two
- not being able to say no
- having low self-esteem
- feeling drained from overdoing for others
- not doing things I like to do for myself for fear of being selfish
- criticizing myself for not feeling as loving as I think I should
- being upset that others don't tune in to me as I do them
- working hard to be tactful and considerate that I suppress my feelings

Twos as Children Often
- are very sensitive to disapproval and criticism
- try hard to please parents by being helpful and understanding
- are outwardly compliant
- are popular or try to be popular with other children
- act coy, precocious, or dramatic in order to get attention
- are clowns and jokers (the more extroverted Twos), or quiet and shy (the more introverted Twos)

Twos as Parents
- are good listeners
- love their children unconditionally
- are warm and encouraging (or suffer guilt if they aren't)
- are often playful with their children
- wonder: "Am I doing it right?" "Am I giving enough?" "Have I caused irreparable damage?"
- can become fiercely protective

Here's the "cycle" of a 2:

Need to be loved -> help others -> loved -> Need to be loved

In the healthy state, the need to be loved induces Type Twos to help others which causes them to be loved. When Twos feel loved, the need is satisfied and a balance is reached.

In the average state, when Twos' are not helping others and are not loved, the need to be loved increases, which helps Twos to again reach out and help others. Thus the balancing loop can help Twos to recover.

Unhealthy loop controlled by Basic Fear: Fear of being unloved -> resent and manipulate others -> loved -> Fear of being unloved

In the unhealthy state, the basic fear of being unloved can cause Type Twos to feel resentful and try to manipulate others into loving them. This can cause people to love them even less, which further increases Twos' basic fear. The cycle continues to build up.

Insight:
We can see from the diagram that a way to help break the control of the basic fear is to weaken the unhealthy loop. Twos can refrain from manipulating others but start to genuinely help others. This will cause Twos to be loved, and thus reduce the fear of being unloved.


Granted, this is just one perspective, but still, this stuff fascinates me...I think I'll have to further look into this. My sister-in-law gave me a book a while back that I never got around to reading called "The Real You" which is about personality types and birth order. Now that school is almost over, I will have some more time to do a lot of the reading I've wanted to do for a while now.

Should be an interesting study.

xylo

I am absolutely amazed by sound.

It is fascinating to me how people can make the most beautiful and melodius sounds from the most random things. Last night, I had the priveledge of attending my first Sigur Ros show. For those of you who are unfamiliar with Sigur Ros, they are an Icelandic band, with a sound that is very mellow, but packed with lots of stringed instruments, piano, guitar, and xylophones. For the majority of the show, the lead singer played his electric guitar with a bow, and there were a lot of pianos and keyboards, including one that sounded like a music box. The show was like nothing I had ever experienced, and every so often, I would just close my eyes, feasting on the amazing ear candy they were delivering.

However, there was a "band" that opened up for Sigur Ros, I believe by the name Amina. The picture above is from their website. Four women entered the stage in what looked slightly like Riverdance type dresses, but proceeded to blow me away with their musical abilities. The amount of instruments they played was impressive, but the types of instruments is what amazed me. There was one woman who played the saw two different ways. They had a stage filled with a plethora of stringed instruments (violins and cello), xylophones, bells, a Mac computer where they were recording live tracks and then looping/mixing them... Brilliant. I was captivated by their ability to take a bunch of random melodies, and blend them together to be unbelievably harmonius.

The concert as a whole was fantastic. My ears and eyes were joyous at the sounds and sights the concert had to offer. I can honestly say it was one of the most unique and yet most enjoyable experiences I've had in a while. Kudos to the Icelandic boys and girls.

And can I tell you how much I love the xylophone?

sporatic

Wow...

It's been a really long time since I've posted. It's not that nothing is going on, it's just, well... Ok, here's the deal.

When I write on my blog, I tend to not journal (in my personal journal) as much. And when I write in my journal, I don't seem to blog as often. I'm not sure if it's just because I can't write in two places at once, or what the deal is. But this is the problem I've found myself in...

I've been journaling a lot more in my personal journal. Two reasons: One, I really love old-school journaling. There's something way more theraputic about manually writing and drawing pictures in a book than sitting behind a computer. There's something great about using a pen, and writing on an empty white paper that's just screaming to be marked up, than looking at frames and buttons, and punching in keys. The second reason is I can be brutally honest without having to be held responsible for it by the public, you know? I mean, it's kind of a scary thought to think about writing some of the stuff running through my head here on the good ole internet for anyone to read. Plus, because some of my thoughts are not solid, I didn't want to post them. Like, where I'm looking to live, work, go to church, and different things going on in my relationships. Therefore, journaling in my personal journal has just "fit" as of late because I can write what's really on my heart, instead of writing bits and pieces on here.

However, I don't want to abandon my blog. There's something so great about blogging, and the strange sort of community that comes from it. I love to blog about what I'm watching, listening to, and things I'm experiencing. You'll just have to bear with me that at this point in my life, it might be kind of sporatic.

I'm currently in Illinois as I write this, about to be a part of a conference that's going on at Sonlife. So, for the next three days I'll be pretty busy with that. Hopefully I'll get the opportunity to write some more within the next few days, but I'm not sure how crazy I'll be.

I just wanted to check in with my fellow bloggers, and let you all know that I'm alive and kicking, and that I'm not abandoning my blog... Just a little inconsistent. I hope to try harder and put more up, but only time will tell...

Thanks for stickin' with me.